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Task 5: Briefly summarize the problem the speakers are discussing. Then state which of the two solutions from the conversation you would recommend. Explain the reasons for your recommendation. v.1

Task 5: Briefly summarize the problem the speakers are discussing. Then state which of the two solutions from the conversation you would recommend. Explain the reasons for your recommendation. v. 1
There has been growing momentum in recent years towards movements for children starting school after the life of 7. In my opinion, although going to educational institution from a young youth will help with social development, children should be allowed to grow outside institution until the age of 7. Proponents of early schooling often point out the clinical research on the impact of school on social skills. At home, children are exposed to a variety of different circumstances. They may or may not have siblings, their parents might take them out often or neglect them at home, hampering their social skills. Once children start school, they are all in more or less an equal environment where they must communicate with older and younger children, compromise when playing, learn to listen to their teachers, and start forming stable bonds based on empathy and shared interests with others. Despite the social advantages, children can develop more uniquely if they are allowed to delay their entrance to formal schooling. A good example of this is in Finland, where students do not begin school until after the age of 7. Finland is renowned for its top-performing students, but this can be traced to a number of factors besides simply youth. However, the impact on individual development is apparent. According to research in child psychology, children form the basis of their personality between the ages of 4 and 7. Therefore it is paramount to delay the age when they begin school in order to give them room to breath and ultimately produce a greater variety of voices in society at large as has been the case in Finland. In my opinion, the social benefits of faculty do not outweigh the individual positives of delayed schooling to both the individual and society. Schools should continue to research this area so that they can better advise policymakers.
There has been growing momentum in recent years towards movements for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
starting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
after the life of 7. In my opinion, although going to educational institution from a young youth will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
development,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to grow outside institution until the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 7.

Proponents of early schooling
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
point out the clinical research on the impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. At home,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are exposed
to a variety of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
circumstances. They may or may not have siblings, their parents might take them out
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
or neglect them at home, hampering their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. Once
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, they are all in more or less an equal environment where they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
communicate with older and younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, compromise when playing, learn to listen to their teachers, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
forming stable bonds based on empathy and shared interests with others.

Despite the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
advantages,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can develop more
uniquely
if they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to delay their entrance to formal schooling. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example of this is in Finland, where students do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
until after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of 7. Finland
is renowned
for its top-performing students,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this can
be traced
to a number of factors
besides
simply
youth.
However
, the impact on individual development is apparent. According to research in child psychology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
form the basis of their personality between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ages
of 4 and 7.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
it is paramount to delay the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
in order to give them room to breath and
ultimately
produce a greater variety of voices in society at large as has been the case in Finland.

In my opinion, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
benefits of faculty do not outweigh the individual positives of delayed schooling to both the individual and society.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Schools
should continue to research this area
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can better advise policymakers.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
Chinese Proverb

IELTS essay Task 5: Briefly summarize the problem the speakers are discussing. Then state which of the two solutions from the conversation you would recommend. Explain the reasons for your recommendation. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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