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Task 3: Letter in the Centerville College News The administration has plans to acquire a new sculpture for campus. We should all oppose this plan. The university’s poor financial condition led it to increase the price for campus housing and tuition by 15 v.1

Task 3: Letter in the Centerville College News The administration has plans to acquire a new sculpture for campus. We should all oppose this plan. The university’s poor financial condition led it to increase the price for campus housing and tuition by 15 v. 1
Massive population growth has been a critical issue for developed and under developing countries. Adding insult to injury, imbalanced and the inconsistent ratio of population between older and younger age people is another serious problem which governments failed to tackle while handling mounting population. For a nation to grow strong or an organization to spread its wings wide requires senior citizen’s enormous experience as well as young individual’s strength and commitment. I concur with the latter part of the statement because elderly people contribute and play significant role in the society. My views on this topic have been bolstered by a few personal experiences. Grand Parents plant the seeds of good behaviour, ethics and morals in their grandchildren’s minds which will mould them into better individuals and also build a great nation because today’s children are tomorrow’s citizens. Especially, they transfer culture and traditions for future generations. For an instance, in my community, retired officers engage in voluntary service such as raising complains and fight against unlawful and illegal activities to weed out antisocial entities from the society. Summing up these things, I believe that elderly people play a pivotal role in the society. In deep contrast to my views, a few sections of people have an opinion that old ones and their groups are unimportant and burden to the country. Moreover, Bureaucrats and a plethora of Activists assume that old aged people enjoy pensions and privileges even after their retirement. But the old ones are those who serve the nation at an age where health doesn’t support. I strongly feel that elderly individuals are as important as young ones. Based on the elaborated discussion in the above paragraphs, I think that senior citizens actively participate in building a powerful place to live because they impart vast knowledge related to various social things and fight against bad things.
Massive population growth has been a critical issue for developed and under
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
. Adding insult to injury, imbalanced and the inconsistent ratio of population between older and younger age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
another serious problem which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
failed to tackle while handling mounting population. For a nation to grow strong or an organization to spread its wings wide requires senior citizen’s enormous experience
as well
as young individual’s strength and commitment. I concur with the latter part of the statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
contribute and play significant role in the society.

My views on this topic have
been bolstered
by a few personal experiences. Grand Parents plant the seeds of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
, ethics and morals in their grandchildren’s minds which will
Possible spelling mistake. 'mould' is British English.
mould
them into better individuals and
also
build a great nation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s children are tomorrow’s citizens.
Especially
, they transfer culture and traditions for future generations. For an instance, in my community, retired officers engage in voluntary service such as raising complains and fight against unlawful and illegal activities to weed out antisocial entities from the society. Summing up these things, I believe that elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
play a pivotal role in the society.

In deep contrast to my views, a few sections of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have an opinion that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
and their groups are unimportant and burden to the country.
Moreover
, Bureaucrats and a plethora of Activists assume that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
aged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
enjoy pensions and privileges even after their retirement.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
are those who serve the nation at an age where health doesn’t support. I
strongly
feel that elderly individuals are as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as young ones.

Based on the elaborated discussion in the above paragraphs, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that senior citizens
actively
participate in building a powerful place to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they impart vast knowledge related to various social things and fight against
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
things.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
The joy of knowing a foreign language is inexpressible. I find it really difficult to express such joy in my mother tongue.
Munia Khan

IELTS essay Task 3: Letter in the Centerville College News The administration has plans to acquire a new sculpture for campus. We should all oppose this plan. The university’s poor financial condition led it to increase the price for campus housing and tuition by 15 v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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