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talk about your bedroom in your house

talk about your bedroom in your house 707Qn
For the past 21 years, I have lived in a house with my family. My humble home is in a small and quiet street, so coming home to me is like all the crazy things happening outside being left behind. Right next to my house there is a big old tree. I love my house and my favorite room in the house is my bedroom. My bedroom is on the second floor of my house and it is a fairly simple room with walls painted beige, a peaceful color. The fresh air outside. I usually open the window to enjoy the wind and sun, this will help cool my room when there is no air conditioner. Since I spend most of my time at home, my room means the whole world to me. It is like a friend who is always by my side, sharing the ups and downs with me. Everyone in this world has a favorite place. Some people tend to stay in their workplace and some like to spend time at restaurants, but I'm an introvert and I mostly enjoy spending time at my home. So I always miss home, miss my room whenever I'm absent. If you want me to talk about the room; I can say that my room is not what I imagined before, but the current room is quite satisfying for me. It has all the necessary things for a bedroom such as an air conditioner, bed, and wardrobe. The interior of the room was chosen by me and decorated in a very unique way. I liked my room but there are certain changes I would like to make in the room. Firstly, I was not satisfied with the size of the room's window. I wanted it bigger because I like big windows with white lace curtains. Another change that I want to make in my room is that I want to put some photos in the room, I love taking pictures so I want to leave my photos in the room. And the last thing I want to change in my room is adding a sofa along with a white carpet. The room would be more beautiful if there was a sofa and I could relax.
For the past 21 years, I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
with my family. My humble home is in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
and quiet street,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
coming home to me is like all the crazy things happening outside being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
behind. Right
next
to my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
there is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
tree. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
and my favorite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
is my bedroom. My bedroom is on the second floor of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
and it is a
fairly
simple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
with walls painted beige, a peaceful color. The fresh air outside. I
usually
open the window to enjoy the wind and sun, this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
cool my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
when there is no air conditioner. Since I spend most of my time at home, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
means the whole world to me. It is like a friend who is always by my side, sharing the ups and downs with me. Everyone in this world has a favorite place.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to stay in their workplace and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
like to spend time at restaurants,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I'm an introvert and I
mostly
enjoy spending time at my home.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I always miss home, miss my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
whenever I'm absent.

If you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
me to talk about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
; I can say that my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
is not what I imagined
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
is quite satisfying for me. It has all the necessary things for a bedroom such as an air conditioner, bed, and wardrobe. The interior of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
was chosen
by me and decorated in a
Consider using "unique".
very unique
way.

I liked my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there are certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
I would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
.
Firstly
, I was not satisfied with the size of the room's window. I wanted it bigger
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I like
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
windows with white lace curtains. Another
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
that I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
is that I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to put
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
photos in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
taking pictures
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
my photos in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
. And the last thing I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
want
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
is adding a sofa along with a white carpet. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
would be more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
if there was a sofa and I could relax.
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A man who knows two languages is worth two men.
French Proverb

IELTS essay talk about your bedroom in your house

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
374 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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