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Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education

Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education x8Mr9
In many countries which have a poor education system, crime is increasing in a terrible way. Some people think that the most effective way to make an end to this phenomen is by educating criminals. In my view, I believe that the best way is the one which works for the long terms. On the one hand, a lot of criminals after setting them free would come back to their previous actions such as stealing and killing innocents. Moreover, offering education for prisoners will cost the government much money which can be used to make the arrestement process more rapid due to many guiltless have to wait sometimes for months before prosecution. Another reason is that they guarantee having a good education and jobs after leaving which is detrimental for the police because it is going to effect their ability since criminals will be more comfortable and have no fair of jail. On the other hand, the abstract idea of a world without crime might be possible to achieve by offering education for the outlaws especially those who were victims of their society, in other words it is not their fault I think the blame is on their parents because if they had been educated well, they would not be in jail; However, a serious action against cannabis vendors should be taken by governments due to the fact that most of criminals are consumers. In conclusion, educating criminals may be benificial for some of them in particular who have a short period of term, on the contrary others would never change their habits since they grow up with that behavior.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries which have a poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
system, crime is increasing
Consider replacing "in a terrible way" with the adverb for "terrible"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a terrible way
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the most effective way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
to this
Possible spelling mistake found.
phenomen
is by educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
. In my view, I believe that the best way is the one which works for the long terms.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
after setting them free would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
back to their previous actions such as stealing and killing innocents.
Moreover
, offering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for prisoners will cost the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
much money which can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
arrestement
process more rapid due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
guiltless
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
wait
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
for months
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before
prosecution. Another reason is that they guarantee having a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and jobs after leaving which is detrimental for the police
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is going to effect their ability since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
will be more comfortable and have no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
of jail.

On the other hand
, the abstract
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of a world without crime might be possible to achieve by offering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for the outlaws
especially
those who were victims of their society,
in other words
it is not their fault I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the blame is on their parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if they had
been educated
well, they would not be in jail;
However
, a serious action against cannabis vendors should
be taken
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
due to the fact that most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
are consumers.

In conclusion
, educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
may be
Possible spelling mistake found.
benificial
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them
in particular
who have a short period of term,
on the contrary
others would never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their habits since they grow up with that behavior.
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IELTS essay Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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