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Students often have difficulty in making the change from university life to working life. Discuss some of the challenges that students face on leaving university in your country and suggest how they may find work.

Students often have difficulty in making the change from university life to working life. Discuss some of the challenges that students face on leaving university in your country and suggest how they may find work. BwM2m
There are certain external challenging that students have no control over but which they must consider when making the transition from university to work. One crucial issue is the economic situation in the country. in a growing economy, there will always be good opportunities for university leavers in the field of their choice. But an economy in recession will not offer so many options. While there are always jobs in every economic sector, the availability of work in any particular sector may be reduced, Sometimes significantly. This can make it very difficult to find work in a relevant field, and leavers may need to start work in a related sector, or even in a completely different sector. Another effect of a poorly performing economy is the need to travel to find work. Typically, in any country at any time, economic activity is greater in some areas than in others, so workers need to travel to find work, usually in cities. While these challenges may delay starting a desired career, they do not usually prove to be long-term issues and it is usually possible to move to another area or to find work in a different sector, which may create a new long-term opportunity.
There are certain external challenging that students have no control over
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
which they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
consider when making the transition from university to work.

One crucial issue is the economic situation in the country.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
a growing economy, there will always be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
opportunities for university leavers in the field of their choice.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
an economy in recession will not offer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
options.

While there are always jobs in every economic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
, the availability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in any particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
may be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
significantly
. This can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult to find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in a relevant field, and leavers may need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in a related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
, or even in a completely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
sector.

Another effect of a
poorly
performing economy is the need to travel to find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
Typically
, in any country at any time, economic activity is greater in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
areas than in others,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
workers need to travel to find

work,
usually
in cities.

While these challenges may delay starting a desired career, they do not
usually
prove to be long-term issues and it is
usually
possible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to another area or to find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
, which may create a new long-term opportunity.
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IELTS essay Students often have difficulty in making the change from university life to working life. Discuss some of the challenges that students face on leaving university in your country and suggest how they may find work.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
203 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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