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Students are less political than before. What is your opinion? Use examples and reasons to support your claim.

Students are less political than before. What is your opinion? Use examples and reasons to support your claim. QV2W3
The prompt claims that students are less political than before. As far as I’m concerned, I strongly advocate this point of view for two reasons: students being busy and students thinking that politics is complicated. This essay will address the reasons why the younger generation of students have lost enthusiasm in the field of modern politics. First and foremost; students don’t have enough time to be involved in politics. On the other hand, the improvements in the sector of technology and communication of the advanced society have a huge impact not only on the users but also on the students, who are directly or indirectly influenced by the internet. As the world gets more advanced in every sector everyday, the learners, who are trying to catch up with the current society, get more knowledge to learn. Since they have to spend most of their time trying to keep up with the changes in their respective subjects, they can’t pay too much attention to the politics; they’re simply too busy to be politically engaged as the students. Secondarily, politics has become much more complicated than it was used to. So, why is politics hard? Politics is hard due to the fact that people are hard. People are hard since we are unwittingly driven by unconscious forces. The same thing goes for those who seek to govern as well as those who will vote to elect them. Besides, they become more complex every year due to the increasing number of foreign and domestic affairs, different leaders running for a seat in parliament or congress, etc. In addition, emotion plays an essential role in politics. When someone we voted for didn't get enough votes to win a seat in the House of Representatives or the House of Nationalities, we wouldn’t have a great time watching someone we didn’t vote for governing us. Based on the information in the passage, it is better for students not to get involved in politics since it’s complicated. In conclusion, the students are too busy to get engaged in political events in addition to the politics becoming more complicated. Indeed, it is accurate to say that students are less political than before.
The prompt claims that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are less political than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. As far as I’m concerned, I
strongly
advocate this point of view for two reasons:
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
being busy and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
thinking that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politics
is complicated
. This essay will address the reasons why the younger generation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have lost enthusiasm in the field of modern politics.

First
and foremost;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
don’t have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to
be involved
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politics
.
On the other hand
, the improvements in the sector of technology and communication of the advanced society have a huge impact not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
on the users
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are
directly
or
indirectly
influenced by the internet. As the world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
more advanced in every sector
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
, the learners,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are trying to catch up with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
society,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more knowledge to learn. Since they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend most of their time trying to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in their respective subjects, they can’t pay too much attention to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politics
; they’re
simply
too busy to be
politically
engaged as the students.

Secondarily
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politics
has become much more complicated than it was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, why is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politics
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
?
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Politics
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
due to the fact that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
since we are
unwittingly
driven by unconscious forces. The same thing goes for those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
seek to govern
as well
as those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
will vote to elect them.
Besides
, they become more complex every year due to the increasing number of foreign and domestic affairs,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
leaders running for a seat in parliament or congress, etc.
In addition
, emotion plays an essential role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politics
. When someone we voted for didn't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
votes to win a seat in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
House
of Representatives or the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
House
of Nationalities, we wouldn’t have a great time watching someone we didn’t vote for governing us. Based on the information in the passage, it is better for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
not to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
involved in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politics
since it’s complicated.

In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are too busy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
engaged in political
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
in addition
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
politics
becoming more complicated.
Indeed
, it is accurate to say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are less political than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.
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IELTS essay Students are less political than before. What is your opinion? Use examples and reasons to support your claim.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
364 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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