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Describe a group activity that you enjoy doing. You should say: -What the activity is? -Who you do it with? -Where you do it and explain why you enjoy it?

Describe a group activity that you enjoy doing. You should say: -What the activity is? -Who you do it with? -Where you do it and explain why you enjoy it? eeKLJ
Being part of team, club, or group is important for our lives. The activity gives chance to participants moving around together and cooperating. It is useful in the early age of team development. I like both individual and group activities. In a group, I can learn from other team members. Team members join together with same goal, and they combine knowledge, skills and motivation to achieve the goal. When we work with people, we learn the importance of working hand in hand to achieve a common goal and our collaborative, communication, and listening skills will develop. Last year, I and my group of friends decide to do volunteering. The reason we made that decision is because of Covid 19 pandemic. The pandemic effected on environment, society, education as well as economy. Globally suffers from coronavirus. But unfortunately, the economic impacts also have dramatic effects low-income families. So, me and my high school friends decided to help low-income families. Always we celebrated our birthdays together. And instead of giving birthday present we started fundraise the money. Then with the money we raised, we purchased basic living requirements and gave them to needy families. Such as, flour, rice and coals. We did this activity in Bayan-Ulgii province with high school classmates. Since that time we regularly organize like this donation activities. We do this activity every season. It has become a tradition in our class to give a helping-hand to someone in need. Recently, when we heard about a child who suffering from a serious illness, we raised money and donated it. All group members happy by participating to this project. I enjoy this activity for the following reasons. Firstly, I like make someone happy, to help others and bring smile to someone’s face. Secondly, seeing someone happy makes me happy too. It is better to give, than to receive. Being helpful to others gives me pleasure. Finally, volunteering teaches me so many lessons. I learn life lessons from volunteering. t is changes my attitude. It lead to me self-improvement, confidence, motivation and humble. It teaches me important skills. Such as, teamwork, communication, problem solving, organization, project planning. So this is something that I enjoy doing in a group.
Being part of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
, club, or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
chance to participants moving around together and cooperating. It is useful in the early age of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
development. I like both individual and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
. In a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
, I can learn from other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
members.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Team
members
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
together with same goal, and they combine knowledge,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and motivation to achieve the goal. When we work with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, we learn the importance of working hand in hand to achieve a common goal and our collaborative, communication, and listening
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
will develop.

Last year, I and my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of friends decide to
The usual collocation for an activity ending in "-ing" is "go" not "do" or "play." Revise: "go volunteering".
do volunteering
. The reason we made that decision is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
Covid 19
pandemic. The pandemic effected on environment, society, education
as well
as economy. Globally suffers from coronavirus.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
unfortunately, the economic impacts
also
have dramatic effects low-income families.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, me and my high school friends decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
low-income families.
The adverb 'Always' is usually not used at the beginning of a sentence.
Always
we celebrated our birthdays together. And
instead
of giving birthday present we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
fundraise the money. Then with the money we raised, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
basic living requirements and gave them to needy families. Such as, flour, rice and coals. We did this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bayan-Ulgii
province with high school classmates.
“Since” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Since
that time we
regularly
organize like this donation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
. We do this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
every season. It has become a tradition in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
a helping-hand to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
someone
in need. Recently, when we heard about a child who suffering from a serious illness, we raised money and donated it. All
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
members
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
by
The usual preposition for "participating" is "in" not "to". Revise: "participating in".
participating to
this project.

I enjoy this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
for the following reasons.
Firstly
, I like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
someone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
others and bring smile to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
someone’s
face.
Secondly
, seeing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
someone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
me
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
too. It is better to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
, than to receive. Being helpful to others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
me pleasure.
Finally
, volunteering teaches me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
lessons. I learn life lessons from volunteering.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
t
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
my attitude. It
Did you mean "leads"?
lead
to me self-improvement, confidence, motivation and humble. It teaches me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. Such as, teamwork, communication, problem solving, organization, project planning.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
this is something that I enjoy doing in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
.
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IELTS essay Describe a group activity that you enjoy doing. You should say: -What the activity is? -Who you do it with? -Where you do it and explain why you enjoy it?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
367 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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