Statement of Purpose for PhD Scholarship in Linguistics

Although being raised in a patriarchal society of third world country, the deep-seated anti-feminist and misogynist values in my culture were exposed to me when I was working on my final project of graduation “Social Criticism in the Light of Culture and Anarchy” (by Mathew Arnold). This project envisioned me about the social and cultural values of the society that has traditionally declared the female gender as frail, inferior, and vulnerable being as compared to the male gender. Soon after my graduation from the University of Sindh Jamshoro in 2014, I started teaching English Literature and language. The journey to start my career as an English teacher was no less than persuading the stiff mountains to shake. When I started my career as an English Teacher none except my father supported me in my conservative closed family system. I hail from a social structure where the elders have the power to decide the fate of the individual and to overcome this obstacle I have the support of only my father who defended my desire to gain a professional degree and start my goal as an accomplished teacher. I achieved 2nd position in my BS in English Literature and after a few years of gaining experience of teaching language, I achieved the degree of M. S in Linguistics. Throughout my career, I have been researching the existing teaching and learning practices in Pakistan, whether how and what is taught in which language? Similarly, are these prevailing methods and techniques in language teaching have been producing any productive results? Inquisitions in the flaws of the educational system in Third World countries like Pakistan, India, and Afghanistan so on, have opened one of the most important and basic issues which are similar in most of the third world countries, i. e. gender discrimination in education. When I ponder over my life, I myself felt that the girls in our society are sent to lower standard or free public schools which have an inferior standard of education. There is a general perception in our social order that the girl has to marry soon, produce progeny and take care of the household. The professional career and earning a decent income with personal achievement in life are not for her. Though I feel lucky enough to complete my M. S in Linguistics along with my Bachelor's and Master's in Education, yet I had to suffer my share of discrimination without any discount. I came from a lower middle class where a major part of the resources at hand goes to male education and career while bits and chunks are left for the girls. I have faced discouragement and neglects from my elders to get admission to University let alone the desire to start a profession as a teacher. However, like strong winds and storms produce stronger trees, similarly, all these external dejections didn’t weaken my inner fire instead they produced blaring flames in me and made me stronger than ever. During my educational period, I got myriads of opportunities to discover my potential and leadership qualities. From GR (Girls’ representatives) to the head of Girls union of Arts Faculty, University of Sindh, Jamshoro, I have advocated the need of providing equality to the female gender in institutions. Though I had a tough time managing my classes and addressing and solving girls’ issues, yet I managed everything to sail smoothly. Debating and meeting for hours in the dean’s or HOD department empowered me to be vocal about threats and insecurities about female gender equality and opportunities in educational institutions. I was oppressed emotionally and financially but I decided to break this chain of oppressions and not surrender in front of my ultimate goals. Being an outspoken and sociable person, I coped up with extra-curricular activities easily whether it was debate competition, speech, hosting, and so on. I feel myself at home on the stage especially when it comes to my cup of tea i. e. Linguistics. During my B. S English, I secretly volunteered to take part in social community services which included various courses related to language learning and skills developing in girls hailing from Rural backgrounds. I still remember those poor girls smiling faces and hopeful eyes for a better future. Such voluntary contribution gave satisfaction to my conscience and have increased my desire to give more to society for the betterment of others. Finally, I got my second position but before that in my last year 2013, I took the first and the biggest ever decision of my life to throw myself in a practical world without bringing it to the notice of my family, they just knew about my university. On the other hand, I started working as an intern for almost no amount of money as a Lecturer just to get first-hand experience of classrooms and teaching as a profession. As soon as I got my result of BS, it was quite natural for me to look for a proper full-time job. Further, my internship was no more a secret and I was forced to leave the job. Although, I didn’t want to settle myself unless I secure a job but unfortunately, my family didn’t let me allow to carry on with the job offer from my department IELL at UOS. I was tortured emotionally to marry a guy whom I have never seen in my life. From April 2014 to August 2014, I took almost 05 months, I had to convince my parents that this is not the kind of life, I planned for myself. Fortunately, I was successful in convincing my family to call off this unwanted engagement gave me a huge blow of mental depression but I reminded myself at every step that I am born fighter and an admirer of Imran Khan, which kept on instilling a spirit inside me to fight for myself even if the world mocks at you. My first full-time job was at the Faheem Education Levels system. Since then I have had no way to look back. Working as a teacher cum lecturer besides working as an Activity In-charge at County School and Girls College. These 05 years groomed me incredibly and I got first-hand experience. Dusk of 31st Dec 2020 to the Dawn of 2021 proves to be the best years of my life so far. Academically and professionally. In Jan 2021, I got overwhelmed to see my first ever research paper published. One of the major work experiences, I have had is to work as a research helper for a research paper on women empowerment concerning the Aurat March in Pakistan. There, I conceived the idea of my Ph. D. proposal which is in the initial stage of being hatched “victim-blaming of women in Pakistan” On 10th Feb 2021, I even got bigger news of getting my second paper published in an X category research journal. Finally, in March 2021, I found myself marching towards my dreams, step by step. In the beginning, I received the results of my MA in Urdu, then on 15th March, I officially joined Liaquat University of Medical and Health Sciences as an English Lecturer and then I got my transcript of MS in English Linguistics, proving my best of best grades of my entire life i. e. 3. 68 in MS Linguistics. My role as a teacher to be precise is, to encourage my students and assist them to discover their inner potential, polish their skills, improve their talents and find happiness in life. I have always motivated my students to vent out their own feelings and desire about topics of discussion so that they could learn to make their individual perceptions about matters in their life. I have always dejected the old authoritative ways of teaching in which students are oppressed pedagogically. In addition, to my role as a teacher, I have always been at the forefront to support the cause of women's rights in society. I have been a permanent member of an indigenous community service in my locality which supports housewives and girls from socially, financially, and emotionally oppressed sector of society and educate them with skills and ways in order to make them self-sufficient and independent. Being an independent and accomplished woman, I want to assist others as well so that the prevailing gender inequality could be reduced. My contribution as a researcher to my institute and country would be to highlight the real discrete motives behind sexual violence against the female gender enshrined in the language and literature of the Asian nations of the subcontinent. Currently, I feel mature and confident enough as a language researcher to discuss this sensitive and upsetting issue of sexual violence faced majorly by the women of my country. Therefore, I intend to change my research orientation and want to address the issues through my research that are faced by rape victims, specifically by women in a patriarchal and stereotypical Asian society like in Pakistan. This research aims to develop my research skills and accumulate experience in critical and thorough research on literature to prepare, maintain and complete a comprehensive and detailed thesis, helping women to stand with grace even after facing heinous sexual assault rather than facing victim-blaming.