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Split GraduationTraditionally, the university holds one ceremony for all graduating students, during which students are awarded their diplomas. Beginning this year, however, the university will hold two graduation ceremonies. Under the new arrangement, ha v.1

Split GraduationTraditionally, the university holds one ceremony for all graduating students, during which students are awarded their diplomas. Beginning this year, however, the university will hold two graduation ceremonies. Under the new arrangement, ha v. 1
Life is thought by some to be less complicated when the amount of language spoken around the world is reduced, even as it is proven that a handful of them are found to be non- existent each year. I agree with this thought even though there may be a disadvantage to it. To begin with, having fewer languages will edge the world of globalization. This is because there would be lesser communication barriers, leading to more international travel, interracial marriages and relocation of residence. For example, a Nigerian who only speaks English, can be encouraged to travel to the Britain, and because he loves the weather and can communicate effectively, he decides to relocate to the new nation, gets married, and spend the remainder of his life there. This may be impossible if he speaks his dialect. In addition, there will better comity of nations. This will douse international tensions as the leadership of these lands will likely understand themselves better. For example, US-China trade war may not be so intense if they had a more common factor. The two world powers would rather battle climate change by contributing their enormous resources and trade benefits towards this worthy cause rather than antagonising each other commercially. However, extinguishing some lingua Franca can lead to global cultural loss. This will be attributed to an unintentional acceptance of the new lower amount culture associated with the new and dominant language, leading to the loss of the weaker one be lost. For example, the Yoruba will gradually obliterate the memory of their culture as they speak more English and invariably accepting their views and perception of life. That would occur if this issue has not occurred In conclusion, Dying out of a language can be very beneficial to the global community but it comes with its repercussion. It should be that, they are learnt without necessarily leaving out each person's dialect.
Life is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
to be less complicated when the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
spoken around the world is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
, even as it
is proven
that a handful of them
are found
to be non- existent each year. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
even though
there may be a disadvantage to it.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, having fewer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
will edge the world of globalization. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there would be lesser communication barriers, leading to more international travel, interracial marriages and relocation of residence.
For example
, a Nigerian who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
speaks English, can
be encouraged
to travel to the Britain, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loves
the weather and can communicate
effectively
, he decides to relocate to the new nation,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
married, and spend the remainder of his life there. This may be impossible if he speaks his dialect.

In addition
, there will better comity of nations. This will douse international tensions as the leadership of these lands will likely understand themselves better.
For example
, US-China trade war may not be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
intense if they had a more common factor. The two world powers would
rather
battle climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
by contributing their enormous resources and trade benefits towards this worthy cause
rather
than
Possible spelling mistake. 'antagonising' is British English.
antagonising
each other
commercially
.

However
, extinguishing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
lingua
Possible spelling mistake found.
Franca
can lead to global cultural loss. This will
be attributed
to an unintentional acceptance of the new lower amount culture associated with the new and dominant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
, leading to the loss of the weaker one
be lost
.
For example
, the Yoruba will
gradually
obliterate the memory of their culture as they speak more English and
invariably
accepting their views and perception of life. That would occur if this issue has not
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
occurred


In conclusion
, Dying out of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beneficial to the global community
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with its repercussion. It should be that, they are
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
without
necessarily
leaving out each person's dialect.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Split GraduationTraditionally, the university holds one ceremony for all graduating students, during which students are awarded their diplomas. Beginning this year, however, the university will hold two graduation ceremonies. Under the new arrangement, ha v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
317 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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