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Speaking topic in text: Using the examples from the lecture, discuss two types of narrators that an author of fiction might use. v.1

Speaking topic in text: Using the examples from the lecture, discuss two types of narrators that an author of fiction might use. v. 1
It is indeed true that video cameras are increasing being used in many metropolitan cities to deter crime. While I accept that surveillance cameras invade our privacy, in my opinion, the benefits of using them to improve security undoubtedly outweigh the demerits. The installation of video cameras in public places certainly leads to the invasion of privacy. They capture each and every moment and as such people who are aware of their presence often feel forced to make a conscious effort to conduct themselves respectably when they access public places. While this is not a major issue, it can certainly be a nuisance at times. Even so, I would argue that the benefits derived from deploying video cameras in public places are more pronounced than the limitations. Firstly, they make public places safer by reducing or even preventing criminal activities. This is because being under the constant surveillance of video cameras deters both amateur and seasoned criminals from committing crimes. They understand that they are being watched and this stops them from doing anything illegal. For example, New Zealand, which is one of the most peaceful nations in the world, has considerably reduced the crime rate during the night by installing video cameras at all public places. Of course, increasing police patrolling of streets may also help to reduce crime, but cameras have an advantage over human law keepers. Unlike a human police officer, a surveillance camera will not fall asleep or develop fatigue while on duty. In conclusion, the advantages of utilizing / installing video cameras to enhance security at public places certainly outweigh the disadvantages. After all, safety is more important than privacy.
It is
indeed
true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cameras
are increasing being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
metropolitan cities to deter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. While I accept that surveillance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cameras
invade our privacy, in my opinion, the benefits of using them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
security
undoubtedly
outweigh the demerits.

The installation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cameras
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
certainly
leads to the invasion of privacy. They capture each and every moment and as such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are aware of their presence
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
feel forced to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a conscious effort to conduct themselves
respectably
when they access
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
. While this is not a major issue, it can
certainly
be a nuisance at times.

Even
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, I would argue that the benefits derived from deploying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cameras
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
are more pronounced than the limitations.
Firstly
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
safer by reducing or even preventing criminal activities. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
being under the constant surveillance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cameras
deters both amateur and seasoned criminals from committing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. They understand that they are being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
and this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stops
them from doing anything illegal.
For example
, New Zealand, which is one of the most peaceful nations in the world, has
considerably
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate during the night by installing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cameras
at all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
Of course
, increasing police patrolling of streets may
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cameras
have an advantage over human law keepers. Unlike a human police officer, a surveillance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
camera
will not fall asleep or develop fatigue while on duty.

In conclusion
, the advantages of utilizing / installing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cameras
to enhance security at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
certainly
outweigh the disadvantages.
After all
, safety is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than privacy.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages know nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay Speaking topic in text: Using the examples from the lecture, discuss two types of narrators that an author of fiction might use. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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