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“Sometimes it is better to be dishonest. ” Use specific reasons and details to support your answer. v.2

“Sometimes it is better to be dishonest. ” Use specific reasons and details to support your answer. v. 2
In today' s sophisticated and progressive world, the importance of truth is not covered to anyone. Honesty is one of the momentous factors for communication among people. In this vein, some individuals believe that there are some circumstances that people are allowed to be dishonest while others hold the view that people mast tell the truth anytime. I totally support the idea of the latter group and the reasons clarifying my point of view are elaborated upon hereunder. First of all, being dishonest may cause to loose friends or hurt their emotions. To be more specific, humans do not like untruth naturally and it is unpleasant for them to have relationship with people who are not honest. For example, from my own experience, when I was a university student, I had a close friend that we were spending a lot of time together. One day, when he requested a book from me, I told a lie to him, which I had lost the book. I said this because I needed the book that time. Thus when my friend found out that I had told untruth to him, he got upset and our pleasant relationship stopped because of my dishonesty. As can be seen, saying untruth can have bad affects on friends' relationships. In addition, since children learn anything from their surrounding, being dishonest may have undesired effects on them. It is common knowledge that children are not capable of distinguishing the well behavior related to different circumstances. Therefore, when we tell a lie and justify our action, children will imitate this behavior and they will learn to be dishonest unintentionally. For instance, recent scientific research conducted by the University of Alberta researchers has shown that the majority of the children who being dishonest is their common behavior are grown up in the environment that their family did not tell the truth every time. As it is illustrated from this research, being dishonest even if in few circumstances can affect the behavior of the children. In conclusion, not only do the not being honest can cause to loose our friends but also it can have bad effects on our children who learn anything from older family members. As a result, honesty is a momentous factor to have strong relationships and better future with honest people.
In
Possible spelling mistake found.
today&
#039; s sophisticated and progressive world, the importance of truth is not covered to anyone. Honesty is one of the momentous factors for communication among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In this vein,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals believe that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
circumstances that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dishonest
while others hold the view that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
mast
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
the truth anytime. I
totally
support the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of the latter group and the reasons clarifying my point of view
are elaborated
upon hereunder.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dishonest
may cause
Did you mean "loosing"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'cause' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to loose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
or hurt their emotions. To be more specific, humans do not like untruth
naturally
and it is unpleasant for them to have relationship with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are not honest.
For example
, from my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience, when I was a university student, I had a close
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
that we were spending
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
time together. One day, when he requested a book from me, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
a lie to him, which I had lost the book. I said this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I needed the book that time.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
when my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
found out that I had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
untruth to him, he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
upset and our pleasant relationship
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of my dishonesty. As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
, saying untruth can have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
affects on
Possible spelling mistake found.
friends&
#039; relationships.

In addition
, since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
learn anything from their surrounding, being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dishonest
may have undesired effects on them. It is common knowledge that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are not capable of distinguishing the well
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
related to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
circumstances.
Therefore
, when we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
a lie and justify our action,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will imitate this
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
behavior and
they will learn to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dishonest
unintentionally
.
For instance
, recent scientific research conducted by the University of Alberta researchers has shown that the majority of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dishonest
is their common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
are grown
up in the environment that their family did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
the truth every time. As it
is illustrated
from this research, being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dishonest
even if in few circumstances can affect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
of the children.

In conclusion
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
do the not being honest can cause to
Did you mean "lose" (= miss, waste, suffer the loss etc.)?
loose
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
it can have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effects on our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who learn anything from older family members.
As a result
, honesty is a momentous factor to have strong relationships and better future with honest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay “Sometimes it is better to be dishonest. ” Use specific reasons and details to support your answer. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
384 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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