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Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a gap year, before they begin work or university and see it as a chance to broaden their horizons. For others, this is an expensive waste of time. Which viewpoint do you agree with? v.1

Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a gap year, before they begin work or university and see it as a chance to broaden their horizons. For others, this is an expensive waste of time. Which viewpoint do you agree with? v. 1
It is believed by many that taking a year off from studies and roaming around the world is an ultimate source of knowledge. While some believe that such act is a waste of time and I second the latter mode of thinking, as time is precious and wasting it will result in a waste of potential resources. In order to begin with, time once gone would never come back, meaning that what is now, would not remain the same, later in life. Therefore, if one has received the admission in university or college but decided to postpone it, might face difficulty getting into the same institute a year later, which would be because the centre has now more competent applicants or the institute has closed down the prospective department. Thus, after a year the situation is not the same as it was before, on account of change in time frame. Moreover, travelling requires financial resources as well, and spending valuable means on tours might result in deprivation of resources-allocated specifically for education. To cite one example, one of my friends had worked a part time job throughout his high school, and the hard earned money was saved for college. But then he decided to take a gap year and spent the whole money on trips. Moving forward, a year later when he decided to pursue education, nothing was left for tuition fees. Hence, the funds once saved could have been used for fees, if not wasted on visits. To conclude, in my opinion, time comes with opportunities in terms of financial resources and education and trading it off with a gap year or with travelling will result in loss of aforementioned positives.
It
is believed
by
many
that taking a
year
off from studies and roaming around the world is an ultimate source of knowledge. While
some
believe that such act is a waste of
time
and I second the latter mode of thinking, as
time
is precious and wasting it will result in a waste of potential resources.

In order to
begin
with,
time
once gone would never
come
back, meaning that what is
now
, would not remain the same, later in life.
Therefore
, if one has received the admission in university or college
but
decided to postpone it, might face difficulty getting into the same institute a
year
later, which would be
because
the
centre
has
now
more competent applicants or the institute has closed down the prospective department.
Thus
, after a
year
the situation is not the same as it was
before
, on account of
change
in
time
frame.

Moreover
, travelling requires financial resources
as well
, and spending valuable means on tours might result in deprivation of resources-allocated
specifically
for education. To cite one example, one of my friends had worked a part
time
job throughout his high school, and the
hard earned
money
was saved
for college.
But
then he decided to take a gap
year
and spent the whole money on trips. Moving forward, a
year
later when he decided to pursue education, nothing was
left
for tuition fees.
Hence
, the funds once saved could have been
used
for fees, if not wasted on visits.

To conclude
, in my opinion,
time
comes
with opportunities in terms of financial resources and education and trading it off with a gap
year
or with travelling will result in loss of aforementioned positives.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some young people look forward to a year of travelling, a gap year, before they begin work or university and see it as a chance to broaden their horizons. For others, this is an expensive waste of time. Which viewpoint do you agree with? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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