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Some students work while studying full stop this often result in Latin thank for education and constantly growing under pressure

Some students work while studying full stop this often result in Latin thank for education and constantly growing under pressure ApXd1
It has become common trend that there started working at early age after secondary education; however, it puts strain on them and its consequences can be seen on their academic progress. It causes several problems, which we will discuss in this essay and propose some solutions. To begin with, the primary reason behind their job after school, is finance problem. In other words, higher education need hefty money, in order to pay their tuition fees is there ok to workplaces. So that they are able to manage their study because most of the students, who are in developing countries, cannot import their college expenses. To tackle this problem, government should be given scholarship to unprivileged students and reduce the amount of money full stop it caused not on the reduction in working peoples but also gravitate more students for University studies. Furthermore, another problem is when the student start their education in other cities or overseas. To meet there Ends, they have to work. Although their parents manage their fees, for accommodation and other things need money. They ended up on a job. Moreover, despite money it also gives them a chance to learn new languages and cultures. To address this issue, government need to be provided free hostel and other facilities to immigrants students. It allowed more youngsters to study with any burden. To conclude, although they are working to earn the amount of money, they are able to manage they further education, it can be solved by government, if they give more facilities and ease to marginalized pupils.
It has become common trend that there
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
working at early age after secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
;
however
, it puts strain on them and its consequences can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
on their academic progress. It causes several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
, which we will discuss in this essay and propose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solutions.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the primary reason behind their job after school, is finance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
need hefty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, in order to pay their tuition fees is there ok to workplaces.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that they are able to manage their study
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, who are in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
, cannot import their college expenses. To tackle this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
scholarship to unprivileged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
full
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
it caused not on the reduction in working peoples
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
gravitate more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
for University studies.

Furthermore
, another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
cities or overseas. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
there Ends, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work. Although their parents manage their fees, for accommodation and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
things need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. They ended up on a job.
Moreover
, despite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
it
also
gives them a chance to learn new languages and cultures. To address this issue,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
need to
be provided
free hostel and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
facilities to immigrants
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. It
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
more youngsters to study with any burden.

To conclude
, although they are working to earn the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, they are able to manage they
further
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, it can
be solved
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, if they give more facilities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
to marginalized pupils.
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IELTS essay Some students work while studying full stop this often result in Latin thank for education and constantly growing under pressure

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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