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Some students prefer to take a year off between school and university to work or travel.Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some students take a year off between school and university, to work or to travel. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
With the global rise in student population all over the world, many students are now taking a year off study to explore other opportunities such as gaining work experience or traveling. In my opinion, I think this trend comes with a lot of benefits compared to the drawbacks it might bring. One obvious advantage of taking a year off study is that it gives students first time exposure to the cooperate world. While they work, they also get to gain valuable experience from their employers. Therefore, they learn different skills needed to succeed in a working environment such as leadership skills, critical thinking, and the ability to work effectively as a team member. Not only would these indispensable skills impact their life positively, but also give them an edge over their counterparts. No wonder nowadays, students are now considering this option more than they used to in the past. In addition to the point highlighted above, another benefit is that some undergraduates get to study abroad due to exchange programs run by some intuitions in partnership with other foreign schools. This allows them the opportunity to experience schooling in another country and also get to learn cultures totally different from theirs. To further illustrate this, University of Ghana has an affiliation with other schools in the United Kingdom whereby the best performing students are picked and sent to the UK to study for one year. Consequently, they see this program as a means of motivation to succeed academically in order to get a chance to travel out. In view of the advantages discussed above, it would be erroneous not to point out that, while these students get to work or travel to get the foreign exposure needed, they end up spending longer semesters to complete their degree. In spite of this, the benefits of taking a year off study still outweigh the disadvantages. Hence, students should be encouraged to take a year off study to explore other opportunities.
With the global rise in
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student
population all over the world,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
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students
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
taking a
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year
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off
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
to explore
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other
opportunities such as gaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
experience or traveling. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this trend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefits compared to the drawbacks it might bring.

One obvious advantage of taking a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
off
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
is that it gives
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
first
time exposure to
After 'the', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'cooperate' is correct. If 'cooperate' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
the cooperate
world. While they
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work
, they
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to gain valuable experience from their employers.
Therefore
, they learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
needed to succeed in a working environment such as leadership
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, critical thinking, and the ability to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
effectively
as a team member. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
would these indispensable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
impact their life
positively
,
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but
also
give them an edge over their counterparts. No wonder nowadays,
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students
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
considering this option more than they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to in the past.

In addition
to the point highlighted above, another benefit is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
undergraduates
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to
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study
abroad due to exchange programs run by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
intuitions in partnership with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
foreign schools. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them the opportunity to experience schooling in another country and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to learn cultures
totally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from theirs. To
further
illustrate this, University of Ghana has an affiliation with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
schools in the United Kingdom whereby the best performing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are picked
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to the UK to
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study
for one
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year
.
Consequently
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
this program as a means of motivation to succeed
academically
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a chance to travel out.

In view of the advantages discussed above, it would be erroneous not to point out that, while these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or travel to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the foreign exposure needed, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up spending longer semesters to complete their degree.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
this, the benefits of taking a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
off
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
still
outweigh the disadvantages.
Hence
,
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students
should
be encouraged
to take a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
off
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
to explore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
opportunities.
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IELTS essay Some students prefer to take a year off between school and university to work or travel. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
328 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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