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SOME STUDENTS GO DIRECTLY TO UNIVERSITY OR COLLEGE AFTER HIGHSCHOOL WHILE OTHERS TAKE A GAP YEAR TO WORK OR TRAVEL. DISCUSS AND SAY WHICH YOU PREFER

SOME STUDENTS GO DIRECTLY TO UNIVERSITY OR COLLEGE AFTER HIGHSCHOOL WHILE OTHERS TAKE A GAP YEAR TO WORK OR TRAVEL. DISCUSS AND SAY WHICH YOU PREFER xm8y9
WHILE THERE ARE MANY STUDENTS WHO CHOOSE GOING STRAIGHT AHEAD TO UNDERGRADUATE PROGRAM AFTER SCHOOL TIME, THERE ARE ALSO THOSE ONES WHO WOULD RATHER MAKE A DIFFERENT CHOICE AND SPEND SOME TIME GETTING INTO ANOTHER PROJECT. I WOULD DISCUSS BOTH SIDES OF THE ARGUMENT BUT I WOULD SUPPORT MY OPINION ON THE LATTER TOPIC. FIRST AND FOREMOST I WOULD SAY THERE IS NO FURTHER REASON TO BE IN A RUSH ABOUT UNDERGRADUATE. IT SEEMS TO BE USEFUL HAVING A TIME FOCUSED IN ANOTHER PURPOSES BESIDES THE PROFESSIONALS CENTRAL AIMS. TO ILLUSTRATE THIS POINT I COULD SAY SOMEONE WHO CHOOSE SPENDING A TIME IN ANOTHER COUNTRY LEARNING A SECOND LANGUAGE WOULD BE GRACED WITN AN UNIQUE OPORTUNITY. AS A CONSEQUENCE, THIS PERSON WOULD FIND OUT A SPECIAL SPOT ON MARKET PLACE AFTER THIS FOREIGN EXPERIENCE. HOWEVER THERE ARE THOSE PEOPLE WHO CONCENTRATE EFFORTS TO CONCLUDE FASTER THEIR FORMATION. THE REASON FOR THIS COULD BE FINANCIAL NEEDS. SOME PEOPLE HAVE NO MONEY SUPPORT TO INVEST TOO MUCH TIME IN THEIR CAREERS AS STUDENTS AND SEEMS TO NEED TO HURRY UP TO GET INTO MARKET PLACE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. THE RESULT OF THIS WOULD BE NO FURTHER PLANS BESIDES UNDERGRADUATION AND MARKET PLACE DIRECTLY. AS A CONCLUSION, I WOULD RESPECT BOTH OPINION BUT I WOULD SAY THERE IS NO SPENT TIME ON LIFE WHILE ONES ARE INVESTING ON THEIR OWN PERSONAL GROWTH. AS MUCH UNIQUE OPPORTUNITIES ONE HAVE, AS MUCH WELL-TO-DO ONE WOULD BE TO GRAB/FIND WORK MARKET CHANCES.
WHILE THERE ARE
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
MANY
STUDENTS
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WHO
CHOOSE GOING STRAIGHT AHEAD TO UNDERGRADUATE PROGRAM AFTER SCHOOL
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TIME
, THERE ARE
ALSO
THOSE
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ONES
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WHO
WOULD
RATHER
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
MAKE
A
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
DIFFERENT
CHOICE AND SPEND
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
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TIME
GETTING INTO ANOTHER PROJECT. I WOULD DISCUSS BOTH SIDES OF THE ARGUMENT
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BUT
I WOULD SUPPORT MY OPINION ON THE LATTER TOPIC.

FIRST
AND FOREMOST I WOULD SAY THERE IS NO
FURTHER
REASON TO BE IN A RUSH ABOUT UNDERGRADUATE. IT SEEMS TO BE USEFUL HAVING A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
TIME
FOCUSED IN ANOTHER PURPOSES
BESIDES
THE PROFESSIONALS CENTRAL AIMS. TO ILLUSTRATE THIS POINT I COULD SAY SOMEONE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
WHO
CHOOSE SPENDING A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
TIME
IN ANOTHER COUNTRY LEARNING A SECOND LANGUAGE WOULD
BE GRACED
Possible spelling mistake found.
WITN
AN UNIQUE
Possible spelling mistake found.
OPORTUNITY
. AS A CONSEQUENCE, THIS PERSON WOULD FIND OUT A SPECIAL SPOT ON
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MARKET
PLACE AFTER THIS FOREIGN EXPERIENCE.

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HOWEVER
THERE ARE THOSE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
PEOPLE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
WHO
CONCENTRATE EFFORTS
TO CONCLUDE
FASTER THEIR FORMATION. THE REASON FOR THIS COULD BE FINANCIAL NEEDS.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
PEOPLE
HAVE NO MONEY SUPPORT TO INVEST TOO MUCH
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TIME
IN THEIR CAREERS AS STUDENTS AND SEEMS TO NEED TO HURRY UP TO
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GET
INTO
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MARKET
PLACE AS
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOON
AS POSSIBLE. THE RESULT OF THIS WOULD BE NO
FURTHER
PLANS
BESIDES
Possible spelling mistake found.
UNDERGRADUATION
AND
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MARKET
PLACE
DIRECTLY
.

AS A CONCLUSION, I WOULD RESPECT BOTH OPINION
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BUT
I WOULD SAY THERE IS NO SPENT
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TIME
ON LIFE WHILE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ONES
ARE INVESTING ON THEIR
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
OWN
PERSONAL GROWTH. AS MUCH UNIQUE OPPORTUNITIES ONE HAVE, AS MUCH WELL-TO-DO ONE WOULD BE TO GRAB/FIND WORK
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
MARKET
CHANCES.

IELTS essay SOME STUDENTS GO DIRECTLY TO UNIVERSITY OR COLLEGE AFTER HIGHSCHOOL WHILE OTHERS TAKE A GAP YEAR TO WORK OR TRAVEL. DISCUSS AND SAY WHICH YOU PREFER

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
247 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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