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some schools have banned the use of the phone. is this a positive or a negative one?

some schools have banned the use of the phone. is this a positive or a negative one? 26dJJ
due to the accessibility of the phone, the majority of students have a mobile phone. while this device undoubtedly could affect learning and communication, thus many schools prohibited the phone. from my perspective, this is a positive step and can bring benefits academically and socially. having no access to the phone in the classroom will improve learning. this is because these devices could be a distraction in the learning process. due to these students during the use of the phone, their brain can only focus on the screen, therefore, the possibility of missing valuable information and facts my effect on them when they doing an exam. for instance, one of my friends in high school played a game and he forgets to write some vital notes which was a part of the next exam, so he lost a considerable number of degrees. by imposing a ban on these smart devices, students can Concentrate and benefit theme in their learning journey. another reason why is that phones reduce communication among students. because when they have a break students impulsively play or check the messages and probably spend the whole break time on their phone rather than get a conversation with authors, thereby almost no communication. a good example would be in my last year in high school teachers allowed the use of phone and after a few months, the academics are recognized that the majority of the first-year students have lees friends and authors friendships were on the edge of degradation. ultimately communication is crucial for young individuals and when a school ban these devices the sense of friendship will be among students. in conclusion, regardless of that phones have become a part of our life, I believe their use in school must be ban. by this step students are able to learn and communicate better.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
due
to the accessibility of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
, the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have a mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
while
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
device
undoubtedly
could affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
,
thus
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
prohibited the phone.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
from
my perspective, this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
step and can bring benefits
academically
and
socially
.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
having
no access to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
in the classroom will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
this
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
could be a distraction in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
process.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
due
to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
during the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
, their brain can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
focus on the screen,
therefore
, the possibility of missing valuable information and facts my effect on them when
Did you mean "they're doing", "they are doing", or "they were doing"?
they doing
an exam.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
for
instance, one of my friends in high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
played a
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
game and
he forgets to write
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
vital notes which was a part of the
next
exam,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
he lost a considerable number of degrees.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
by
imposing a ban on these smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can Concentrate and benefit theme in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
journey.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
another
reason why is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
because
when they have a break
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
impulsively
play or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
the messages and
probably
spend the whole break time on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
rather
than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a conversation with authors, thereby almost no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example would be in my last year in high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
teachers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
and after a few months, the academics
are recognized
that the majority of the
first
-year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have lees friends and authors friendships were on the edge of degradation.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
ultimately
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
is crucial for young individuals and when a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "bans".
ban
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
the sense of friendship will be among students.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
conclusion, regardless of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
have become a part of our life, I believe their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
Consider using a past participle here: "banned".
ban
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
by
this step
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are able to learn and communicate better.

IELTS essay some schools have banned the use of the phone. is this a positive or a negative one?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
305 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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