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Some say that sports play an important role in society. Others, however, think that it is nothing more than a leisure activity.

Some would argue that playing sport is simply an activity that people do as an exercise, while others believe that sport has a significant effect on society and people’s life. While training and playing sport can merely leisure, but I assume that sport does have an important function in society. On the one hand, nobody can deny that sport is a great leisure activity. The majority of people all around the world participate in sporting activities every day because of the sense of well-being and relaxation that it brings them. People play sport for numerous reasons, including, wanting to get fit or stay in shape, as a way to take their mind off the stress of daily life. For instance, my wife has a regular plan to go to the gym to do exercise because she has a stressful job and this kind of activities help her to decline the stress. I believe that sport plays a vital role at present in society in comparison with relaxation and getting fit. On the other hand, the sport has so many advantages and It does serve a number of usual functions within society. Sport creates healthier societies. People who play sport are known to be happier and healthier, and less prone to certain mental and physical illness, which reduces the burdens on healthcare systems. Sport also brings people together and creates a sense of unity within societies. This can be witnessed when complete strangers join together to cheer on and support their countries football team. For example, in my own country, whenever our national football team plays with another country, men, women and children get together to support our team and give them a positive sense. I presume that sport has a crucial function and position in societies. In conclusion, It is true some think that sport just is leisure, but I believe that playing sport has more advantages than exercise for people’s life and societies.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
would argue that playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
is
simply
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do as an exercise, while others believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
has a significant effect on
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society
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
life. While training and playing
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sport
can
merely
leisure,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I assume that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
does have an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
function in society.

On the one hand, nobody can deny that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
is a great leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
. The majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
all around the world participate in sporting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
every day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the sense of well-being and relaxation that it brings them.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
for numerous reasons, including, wanting to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
fit or stay in shape, as a way to take their mind off the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
of daily life.
For instance
, my wife has a regular plan to go to the gym to do exercise
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
she has a stressful job and this kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
her to decline the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plays
a vital role at present in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
in comparison
with relaxation and getting fit.

On the other hand
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages and It does serve a number of usual functions within
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sport
creates healthier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
societies
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
are known
to be happier and healthier, and less prone to certain mental and physical illness, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
the burdens on healthcare systems.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sport
also
brings
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
together and creates a sense of unity within
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
societies
. This can
be witnessed
when complete strangers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
together to cheer on and support their countries football team.
For example
, in my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
country, whenever our national football team
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plays
with another country,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
, women and children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
together to support our team and give them a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sense. I presume that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
has a crucial function and position in societies.

In conclusion
, It is true
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
is leisure,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I believe that playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
has more advantages than exercise for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
life and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
societies
.

IELTS essay Some say that sports play an important role in society. Others, however, think that it is nothing more than a leisure activity.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
324 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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