Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some say that rich countries should help poor countries with food and education. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include examples from your experience. v.10

Some say that rich countries should help poor countries with food and education. v. 10
Helping in the world is among the one of the most important qualities. However, poverty stricken nations should be assisting with the essential needs of wealthy nations. Thus, I believe that it's important to the nations to help because the nations can increase their relations. Firstly, food is the most crucial part of the human beings. So the developed countries should provide the support to the underdeveloped countries with food. For examples, the country like Africa, where there is the scarcity of food can get help from the countries like India, The USA, and many more which lead them to use the African resources. Moreover, there are many countries nowadays trying to help there neighbouring countries to get rid of the main problems that is food. In fact, various countries have signed the contract to eradicate the main cause of scarcity of food due to which peoples are dying. Secondly, with this one country can support another country to overcome the problems related to food. On the other hand, education is the valuable source of individuals, without education person has to suffer a lot. According to the research, about more than half of the world population are illiterate. Furthermore, as the world is advancing toward the technologies, there is a lack of the intelligent people available. For that the states who are richer should provide education to the state where literacy rate is minimized. For examples, a lot of countries have come up with ideas to deal up with the situation. Such countries like Germany, Ireland, Australia, has open the gate of their University so that people can get educated with minimum investment. In my opinion, it's important for the countries help each other to gain and cope up with the modern growing world. Lastly, the countries should not discriminate in rich and poor for food and living.
Helping in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
is among the one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
qualities.
However
,
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
poverty stricken
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
should be assisting with the essential needs of wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
.
Thus
, I believe that it's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
can increase their relations.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is the most crucial part of the human beings.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
the developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should provide the support to the underdeveloped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. For examples, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
like Africa, where there is the scarcity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like India, The USA, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more which lead them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the African resources.
Moreover
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
nowadays trying to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
there
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbouring' is British English.
neighbouring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of the main problems
that is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. In fact, various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have signed the contract to eradicate the main cause of scarcity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
due to which peoples are dying.
Secondly
, with this one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
can support another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to overcome the problems related to food.

On the other hand
, education is the valuable source of individuals, without education person
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
suffer a lot. According to the research, about more than half of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
population are illiterate.
Furthermore
, as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
is advancing toward the technologies, there is a lack of the intelligent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
available. For that the states who are richer should provide education to the state where literacy rate
is minimized
. For examples,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
to deal up with the situation. Such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like Germany, Ireland, Australia, has open the gate of their University
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
educated with minimum investment.

In my opinion, it's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
each other to gain and cope up with the modern growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
Lastly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should not discriminate in rich and poor for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and living.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some say that rich countries should help poor countries with food and education. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts