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some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects especially at the primary level. do you agree or disagree? v.8

some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects especially at the primary level. v. 8
Curriculum of a primary school is an integral part in shaping a student's future. Certain people propose that artistic subjects are equally valuable when compared to regular curricular subjects such as maths, science, history. In my opinion, I completely agree with the aforementioned statement as it helps pupil in deciding their interest as well as improves overall growth of a child. Learning creative lessons from early schooling days allows students to choose their area of interest. Therefore, they can have longer time to decide about their likes and making a career out of it alongwith mastering an activity in a better way. For instance, a guitarist with more practice will always outperform another guitarist with less practice. Thus, teaching music, art and drama should be started from primary education so as to bring out the best from a child. Similarly, these subjects along with other conventional subjects like maths, science assists in complete development of a pupil. In other words, they become more expressive by portraying their emotions through art which helps to reduce mental stress to some extent. Which in turn helps to improve academic performance. For example, in a recent survey conducted by the New York Times, school teacher stated that overall performance of an artistic student was better than a student who was confined to other school subjects. Thus, it is fair to conclude that incorporating subjects like music, drama and art along with other syllabus from initial schooling is more advantageous for a better development of a child.
Curriculum of a primary school is an integral part in shaping a student's future. Certain
people
propose that artistic
subjects
are
equally
valuable when compared to regular curricular
subjects
such as
maths
, science, history. In my opinion, I completely
agree
with the aforementioned statement as it
helps
pupil in deciding their interest
as well
as
improves
overall
growth of a child.

Learning creative lessons from early schooling days
allows
students to choose their area of interest.
Therefore
, they can have longer time to decide about their likes and making a career out of it
alongwith
mastering an activity in a better way.
For instance
, a guitarist with more practice will always outperform another guitarist with less practice.
Thus
, teaching music, art and drama should be
started
from primary education
so as to
bring out the best from a child.

Similarly
, these
subjects
along with
other
conventional
subjects
like
maths
, science assists in complete development of a pupil. In
other
words, they become more expressive by portraying their emotions through art which
helps
to
reduce
mental
stress
to
some
extent.
Which
in turn
helps
to
improve
academic performance.
For example
, in a recent survey conducted by the New York Times, school teacher stated that
overall
performance of an artistic student was better than a student who
was confined
to
other
school subjects.

Thus
, it is
fair
to conclude
that incorporating
subjects
like music, drama and art along with
other
syllabus from initial schooling is more advantageous for a better development of a child.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.
Benjamin Lee Whorf

IELTS essay some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects especially at the primary level. v. 8

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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