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Some peopre soy lhol schoors should rcwctrd srudents who show lhe besf ocodemic resulfs, while olhers belieye thol il is more importonl lo reword sfudenls who show improvemenfs. Discuss bolh views ond give yow own opinion.

Some peopre soy lhol schoors should rcwctrd srudents who show lhe besf ocodemic resulfs, while olhers belieye thol il is more importonl lo reword sfudenls who show improvemenfs. Discuss bolh views ond give yow own opinion. KnRw6
Nowadays, a number of people like to get reward. Lots of people think that schools shall reward graduates who show best academic results but others think that it is huge important to reward students who show improvements. The essay discusses the statement. To begin with, people who think that schools shall give reward to pupils who shows the best result due to the fact, they will get extremely good motivation and they will do more and more study to enhance their intelligence. Apart from this, undergraduates can also improve their reading skill by reading more if they get reward by school. Moreover, students will be able to make their study extremely wonderful. On the flip side, others think that schools shall give reward to the pupils who shows the improvement due to the fact, it is not only good for the graduates but also nice for the school as well as the professors. Moreover, undergraduates, who get rewards from school, they will do more and more things which are an essential to make the career brighter of other graduates and from that, a number of other students inspire to do something for the school and from improvement, they can enhance their creativity skill. Lastly, students do huge experiments to do development for the school with other graduates and they can enhance skills such as communication, interpersonal, leadership, and various more. To put it in a nutshell, as per my opinion, it is essential to reward graduates who shows improvement to appreciate their hard as well as smart work.
Nowadays, a number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
. Lots of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
shall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
A determiner is probably missing here: "show the best".
show best
academic results
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that it is huge
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improvements
. The essay discusses the statement.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
shall give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
to pupils
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
Did you mean "show"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'pupils' should be used.
shows
the best result due to the fact, they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
extremely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
motivation and
they will do more and more study to enhance their intelligence. Apart from this, undergraduates can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their reading
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
by reading more if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their study
extremely
wonderful.

On the flip side, others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
shall give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
to the pupils
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
Did you mean "show"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'pupils' should be used.
shows
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improvement
due to the fact, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduates
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
nice for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
as well
as the professors.
Moreover
, undergraduates,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rewards
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, they will do more and more things which are an essential to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the career brighter of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduates
and from that, a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
inspire to do something for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improvement
, they can enhance their creativity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
.
Lastly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
do huge experiments to do development for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
graduates and
they can enhance
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
such as communication, interpersonal, leadership, and various more.

To put it in a nutshell, as per my opinion, it is essential to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reward
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
graduates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
Did you mean "show"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'graduates' should be used.
shows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improvement
to appreciate their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
as well
as smart work.
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IELTS essay Some peopre soy lhol schoors should rcwctrd srudents who show lhe besf ocodemic resulfs, while olhers belieye thol il is more importonl lo reword sfudenls who show improvemenfs. Discuss bolh views ond give yow own opinion.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • Some peopre soy lhol schoors should rcwctrd srudents who show lhe besf ocodemic resulfs, while olhers belieye thol il is more importonl lo reword sfudenls who show improvemenfs. Discuss bolh views ond give yow own opinion.