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Some people would like to stick to tasks they know they can do well. Others would like to try new things and take risks. Which one do you prefer and why. Give rasons and examples to support your answer. v.1

Some people would like to stick to tasks they know they can do well. Others would like to try new things and take risks. Which one do you prefer and why. Give rasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1
The influence of advertising and not the real needs of the community are reflected by the tremendous demand of popular consumer goods that purchased. Recently, people have bought some stuff based on advertising than their necessaries. This is one of the business strategies to increase sales. Great advertising can make an unnecessary thing that will be bought by many people. Many factors that help to promote some products in the advertisement such as visual of the product, persuasive statements, and artist endorsement. Likewise, this great advertisement shows on TV, radio, social media, and so on, which help products will be introduced to many people. Because of it, the goods will be familiar and become a trend in the public. To follow the newest trend in society, people attempt to get the product even though they do not need it. More people purchase it, therefore the sales of products growing up and. For example the sheet mask for a skin face. The power of advertising makes the sheet mask become a trend in society. Furthermore, the nice appearance, persuasive statement about the sheet mask's function, and promote by rising star affect people to have it. Despite not real needs has higher sales, people still purchase the good thing which not in eye-catching advertising. Some people consider the budget of things that make people think twice to get popular products because some popular products are pricey. Consequently, the power of advertising can not affect these people. In conclusion, any factors for considering the purchase of a commodity, but great advertising becomes the potential to affect people to have stuff even though they do not need it. Therefore, it will be popular in civilization and has high sales in business.
The influence of advertising and not the real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
of the community
are reflected
by the tremendous demand of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
consumer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
. Recently,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
stuff based on advertising than their necessaries. This is one of the business strategies to increase sales.

Great advertising can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an unnecessary thing that will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
factors that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to promote
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in the advertisement such as visual of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
, persuasive statements, and artist endorsement.
Likewise
, this great advertisement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
on TV, radio, social media, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
will
be introduced
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of it, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
will be familiar and become a trend in the public. To follow the newest trend in society,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
attempt to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
even though
they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
it. More
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
it,
therefore
the sales of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
growing up and.
For example
the sheet mask for a skin face. The power of advertising
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the sheet mask become a trend in society.
Furthermore
, the nice appearance, persuasive statement about the sheet mask's function, and promote by rising star affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have it.

Despite not real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
has higher sales,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
thing which not in eye-catching advertising.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider the budget of things that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
twice to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are pricey.
Consequently
, the power of advertising can not affect these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In conclusion
, any factors for considering the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
of a commodity,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
great advertising becomes the potential to affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have stuff
even though
they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
it.
Therefore
, it will be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
in civilization and has high sales in business.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people would like to stick to tasks they know they can do well. Others would like to try new things and take risks. Which one do you prefer and why. Give rasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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