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some people who have been in prison become good citizens later and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of commuting a crime.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is apparently true that manifold people change their life after releasing from prison and become good and successful person in their lives. In this modern era, crime rate has been increasing day by day, especially in youngsters. Thus, there is a populace who believe that ex prisoners are the best mentor for adolescents, who can easily teach them not to commit negative terms. I utterly accord with this statement and in the following paragraphs I will explore in detail why I agree with this statement. To begin with, reformed prisoners experience isolation and punishment. Firstly, our society assume that a person who lives under imprisonment would not a good person. However, technical skills and personality development techniques are provided by some prisons to them, eventually they become good citizens. Unquestionably, they live in bad conditions and get isolate from their family members. So they can tell young about the circumstances of prison, such as how they would live, which food would provide to them, and many more. I personally think that youngsters can relate them with their life and would understand the difference. This would lead to deter youth to disobey the rules and regulations. Additionally, young people ask them questions and rehabilitated offenders can give answers in an effective manner. In contrast, teachers and police man can also teach teenagers about consequences of wrong things. Teachers have a great role in students education, but in my view, if a teacher were impart knowledge regarding violence and crime, kids would not listen them carefully. They would feel bore in their classrooms and in lectures and would forget after a while. Moreover, children frightened from police, so they can not understand those terms from them. In conclusion, I would say have experience about prison life so teenager can ask him question about their life and can commit no to do these mistake.
It is
apparently
true that manifold
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
after releasing from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
and become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and successful person in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
. In this modern era, crime rate has been increasing day by day,
especially
in youngsters.
Thus
, there is a populace who believe that ex prisoners are the best mentor for adolescents, who can
easily
teach them not to commit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
terms. I
utterly
accord with this statement and in the following paragraphs I will explore in detail why I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, reformed prisoners experience isolation and punishment.
Firstly
, our society assume that a person who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
under imprisonment would not a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
person.
However
, technical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and personality development techniques
are provided
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisons
to them,
eventually
they become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
citizens.
Unquestionably
, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
conditions and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
isolate from their family members.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
young about the circumstances of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
, such as how they would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
, which food would provide to them, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more. I
personally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that youngsters can relate them with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and would understand the difference. This would lead to deter youth to disobey the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations.
Additionally
, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
ask them questions and rehabilitated offenders can give answers in an effective manner.

In contrast
, teachers and police
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
can
also
teach
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
about consequences of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
things. Teachers have a great role in students education,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in my view, if a teacher were impart knowledge regarding violence and crime, kids would not listen them
carefully
. They would feel bore in their classrooms and in lectures and would forget after a while.
Moreover
, children frightened from police,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can not understand those terms from them.

In conclusion
, I would say have experience about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prison
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
can ask him question about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and can commit no to do these mistake.
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IELTS essay some people who have been in prison become good citizens later and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of commuting a crime.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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