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Some people today believe that the world’s increase in population is unsustainable and will eventually lead to a global crisis. Other people believe that world population increase is necessary and beneficial as it creates the growth of the world’s economy and society. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

The population of the world is ever growing. Some people believe that this increase has created an unsustainable situation and that it will lead to a global crisis. Other people believe that only through an increasing population can the world’s economy and society develop. This population increase is not constant around the world; population is undergoing significant growth especially in less developed countries, and the continent of Africa is predicted to undergo the highest increase. Many people living in these less developed countries frequently face shortages, such as water, food, heating, cooking fuel and medicines, and people have to live in substandard living conditions by western standards. With more inhabitants, these difficulties will become exacerbated and helping these countries might also create strain on the resources and economies of other countries. On the other hand, many countries are unable to reach their economic potential due to a lack of skilled work forces. For these countries a growing population can mean a stronger economy and, due to that, a better standard of living. Growing populations can also lead to growing demand for goods, allowing economies to expand. The problem is, however, that countries that are in need of labour forces and increasing demand are already the more developed countries and they meet some of these needs by immigration and exporting goods. In conclusion, while certain areas of the world are in need of larger work forces to develop their economies, the continuously increasing population could potentially lead to crisis within countries that already struggle to provide for their inhabitants.
The
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population
of the
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world
is ever
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growing
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
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people
believe that this increase has created an unsustainable situation and that it will lead to a global crisis. Other
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people
believe that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
through an increasing
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population
can the
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world’s
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economy
and society develop.

This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
increase is not constant around the
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world
;
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population
is undergoing significant growth
especially
in less developed
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countries
, and the continent of Africa
is predicted
to undergo the highest increase.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in these less developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
frequently
face shortages, such as water, food, heating, cooking fuel and medicines, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in substandard living conditions by western standards. With more inhabitants, these difficulties will become exacerbated and helping these
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countries
might
also
create strain on the resources and
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economies
of other countries.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are unable to reach their economic potential due to a lack of skilled work forces. For these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
can mean a stronger
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economy
and, due to that, a better standard of living.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Growing
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populations
can
also
lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growing
demand for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
, allowing
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economies
to expand. The problem is,
however
, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
that are in need of
Possible spelling mistake. ‘labour’ is British English.
labour
forces and increasing demand are already the more developed
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
countries and
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of these needs by immigration and exporting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
.

In conclusion
, while certain areas of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
are in need of larger work forces to develop their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economies
, the
continuously
increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
could
potentially
lead to crisis within
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
that already struggle to provide for their inhabitants.

IELTS essay Some people today believe that the world’s increase in population is unsustainable and will eventually lead to a global crisis. Other people believe that world population increase is necessary and beneficial as it creates the growth of the world’s economy and society.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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  • Some people today believe that the world’s increase in population is unsustainable and will eventually lead to a global crisis. Other people believe that world population increase is necessary and beneficial as it creates the growth of the world’s economy and society. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.