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Some people think that young people should be required to unpaid work helping people in the community. What are the benefits of this work to the community and the young people? Write an essay of about 180 words to express your opinion.

Some people think that young people should be required to unpaid work helping people in the community. What are the benefits of this work to the community and the young people? Write an essay of about 180 words to express your opinion. 736LY
It can’t deny that voluntary work provides great benefits for both participants and the community. This essay will show the advantage of it to community and young people. The first advatage is developing social skills. Volunteering can help young people gain confidence by giving the chance to try something new. It can be gain through this activity as teamwork, problem-solving, time-management. Besides, they can challenge themselves to try something different and discover hidden talents. It’s useful for their own future. Another advantage is that volunteering helps connect people from different countries closer together. Teenagers will also have the opportunity to make new friends with all kinds of personalities. It’s easy to make a good relationship with new friends and learn more from them. Last but not least, volunteering helps counteract the effects of stress, anger. It has been shown that people will enjoyable and happy when helping disadvantaged people, which allows them to get rid of anxiety and depression. To sum up, there are a number of benefits that people can gain by doing the volunteer work so it is encouraged that people should spend some free time to take part in this meaningful activity.
It can’t deny that voluntary work provides great benefits for both participants and the community. This essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the advantage of it to community and young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

The
first
Possible spelling mistake found.
advatage
is developing social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. Volunteering can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
gain confidence by giving the chance to try something new. It can be gain through this activity as teamwork, problem-solving, time-management.
Besides
, they can challenge themselves to try something
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
and discover hidden talents. It’s useful for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
future.

Another advantage is that volunteering
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
connect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries closer together.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Teenagers
will
also
have the opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
new friends with all kinds of personalities. It’s easy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
relationship with new friends and learn more from them.

Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, volunteering
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
counteract the effects of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
, anger. It has
been shown
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will enjoyable and happy when helping disadvantaged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of anxiety and depression.

To sum up, there are a number of benefits that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can gain by doing the volunteer work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it
is encouraged
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
free time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in this meaningful activity.

IELTS essay Some people think that young people should be required to unpaid work helping people in the community. What are the benefits of this work to the community and the young people? Write an essay of about 180 words to express your opinion.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
195 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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