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Some people think that when many imported films or TV programmes are shown in a country, it can improve the country’s culture. Others feel that it is better for a country to make and broadcast its own movies and TV shows. Discuss both sides and give your own view

Some people think that when many imported films or TV programmes are shown in a country, it can improve the country’s culture. Others feel that it is better for a country to make and broadcast its own movies and TV shows. Discuss both sides and give your own view GMNoL
A group of people believe that when many bring in movies of TV series are show in a nation, It can enhance the country's culture. On the other hand, Some other individuals notice that it is beneficial for a nation to create and telecast its own films and TV programmes. In my point of view country create own movies and TV series. My point with logical reasons and explanation further. However, the proponents of domestically produced movies assert that these kinds of programs are more essential for societies. The most compelling reason for their assertion is that movies made by local people would help preserve the traditions and customs of their own cultures. For instance, many Iranian Tv programmes remind young generations how people celebrate Nowruz, which is the most significant public holiday in some Asian countries. If young people only watch foreign movies, the traditional values might be gradually forgotten. I agree with this view as the cultural values which identify the people’s nationality is an integral part of any society.
A group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that when
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
bring in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
of TV series are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
in a nation, It can enhance the country's culture.
On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
other individuals notice that it is beneficial for a nation to create and telecast its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
films and TV
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
. In my point of view country create
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
and TV series. My point with logical reasons and explanation
further
.
However
, the proponents of
domestically
produced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
assert that these kinds of programs are more essential for societies. The most compelling reason for their assertion is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
made by local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
preserve the traditions and customs of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
cultures.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Iranian
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tv
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
remind young generations how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
celebrate
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nowruz
, which is the most significant public holiday in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Asian countries. If young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
, the traditional values might be
gradually
forgotten. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view as the cultural values which identify the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
nationality is an integral part of any society.
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IELTS essay Some people think that when many imported films or TV programmes are shown in a country, it can improve the country’s culture. Others feel that it is better for a country to make and broadcast its own movies and TV shows. Discuss both sides and give your own view

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
172 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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