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Some people think that the government should use extra money to fund programs to improve the environment. Others think that it is better to spend money to support artistic programs. Which option do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Some people think that the government should use extra money to fund programs to improve the environment. Others think that it is better to spend money to support artistic programs. Which option do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. oOOb
Some people believe that spending money for improving the arts is one of the most important responsibilities of governments because arts are essential part of every nation’s culture. Personally, I think that this opinion is lacking in well-founded rationales. Although arts are essential in our lives especially in terms of aesthetics, if government has to choose just one option, enhancing the environment is absolutely superior to the art. I feel this way for two main reasons, and I will develop these ideas in the subsequent paragraphs. First and foremost, a healthy environment can improve the first human’s concern throughout the history; health. Mankind as well as other animals, always has been in interaction with their surrounding and every change in their ambience has affected their lives directly. Many species became extinct just because of small change in the nature. Nowadays, pollution, especially in huge cities, is a life threatening problem that results in increasing lung and pulmonary diseases. If authorities do not use money to improve the environment they have to spend more for health problems. For instance, in my home town, Tehran, it is believed that air pollution is responsible for many of deaths every year. It is obvious that government should solve this problem. An unhealthy society does not care about art. Secondly, artistic programs can get money from private parties and many other ways, while nobody is responsible for environment but government. Artists can provide and sell their products to supply budget. Moreover, numerous companies are willing to sponsor artistic activities and fund in these ways. In our industrial world, nature is being progressively destroyed by human activities and, governments should spend money to compensate these adverse effects. As an illustration, last year, a small theater group in our town lost a portion of their budget because the government cut their subsidy. Nevertheless, they could get enough money by selling more tickets and getting some sponsors. Some companies paid them money to advertise their products when they have performance. I strongly believe that a real artist should be capable to live without governments help. As a conclusion, if governments do not fund money to improve our surroundings, destroyed nature impacts our life. The better the environment is, the healthier the life we have. While spending money for art is optional, improving the nature is an obligation.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
is one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
responsibilities of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
are essential part of every nation’s culture.
Personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that this opinion is lacking in well-founded rationales. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
are essential in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
especially
in terms of aesthetics, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
choose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one option, enhancing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
is
absolutely
superior to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
. I feel this way for two main reasons, and I will develop these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
in the subsequent paragraphs.

First
and foremost, a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
first
human’s concern throughout the history; health. Mankind
as well
as other animals, always has been in interaction with their surrounding and every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in their ambience has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
directly
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
species became extinct
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
. Nowadays, pollution,
especially
in huge cities, is a life threatening problem that results in increasing lung and pulmonary diseases. If authorities do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend more for health problems.
For instance
, in my home town, Tehran, it
is believed
that air pollution is responsible for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of deaths every year. It is obvious that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should solve this problem. An unhealthy society does not care about art.

Secondly
, artistic programs can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
from private parties and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other ways, while nobody is responsible for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
. Artists can provide and sell their products to supply budget.
Moreover
, numerous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
are willing to sponsor artistic activities and fund in these ways. In our industrial world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
is being
progressively
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
by human activities and,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to compensate these adverse effects. As an illustration, last year, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
theater group in our town lost a portion of their budget
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
their subsidy.
Nevertheless
, they could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
by selling more tickets and getting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
sponsors.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
paid them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to advertise their products when they have performance. I
strongly
believe that a real artist should be capable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.

As a conclusion, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
do not fund
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our surroundings,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
impacts our life. The better the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
is, the healthier the life we have. While spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is optional, improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nature
is an obligation.
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IELTS essay Some people think that the government should use extra money to fund programs to improve the environment. Others think that it is better to spend money to support artistic programs. Which option do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
389 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Some people think that the government should use extra money to fund programs to improve the environment. Others think that it is better to spend money to support artistic programs. Which option do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.