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Some people think that the government should provide free education at every level However some say individuals should pay for their university education Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people think that the government should provide free education at every level However some say individuals should pay for their university education Discuss both views and give your opinion VLXm
Education is more or less a necessity in this modern era, some are of the opinion that the entirety of an individuals education should be financially backed by the government, other believe that higher education shouldn't be funded by the government rather by the effort's of the students. The below essay will discuss both views and express my opinion. To begin with, many developed countries have made primary and second education free for their country, furthermore, this has evidently shown a gradual increase of educated personal withing a society, For example, Canada and Germany have one of the highest literacy rate amongst other developed countries. This could be contributed to the comprehensive and free education provided by the government. The number of students who opt-in for university education have also seen a drastic increase, as they are more likely to perceive higher education. By performing better academically they could even grab a scholarship to their university education, thereby, the entirety of their student life could be funded by the government. on the other hand, university education is said to be more difficult than your average high school diploma, hence, it should only be offered to the elite of the students, who can actually contribute to the society, therefore, by making university education expensive and by limiting the scholarship offered we can filter out the elite who are more likely to succeed. For instance, Harvard university have intentionally increased their fee structure. This would promote a hierarchy of students who would put in relatively more effort in their academics to obtain a scholarship to the university. Additionally, this has increased the number of graduates in the university who have an overall GPA of more than 75% in their university education. To conclude, in my opinion university education should be granted to only those students who portray their efforts on their marks-sheet. Making it free for all would have no benefits in the long run, as this would abolish the competitive world of education.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
is more or less a necessity in this modern era,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
are of the opinion that the entirety of an
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "individuals'" or "individual's"?
individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
should be
financially
backed by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
, other believe that higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
shouldn't
be funded
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
rather
by the effort's of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. The below essay will discuss both views and express my opinion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
have made primary and second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
free for their country,
furthermore
, this has
evidently
shown a gradual increase of educated personal withing a society,
For example
, Canada and Germany have one of the highest literacy rate amongst other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
. This could
be contributed
to the comprehensive and free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
provided by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
. The number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
opt-in for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
have
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a drastic increase, as they are more likely to perceive higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. By performing better
academically
they could even grab a scholarship to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, thereby, the entirety of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
life could
be funded
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the other hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is said
to be more difficult than your average high school diploma,
hence
, it should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be offered
to the elite of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
can actually contribute to the society,
therefore
, by making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
expensive and by limiting the scholarship offered we can filter out the elite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are more likely to succeed.
For instance
, Harvard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
have
intentionally
increased their fee structure. This would promote a hierarchy of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
would put in
relatively
more effort in their academics to obtain a scholarship to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
Additionally
, this has increased the number of
The verb 'to graduate' requires the preposition 'from': "graduates from".
graduates
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have an
overall
GPA of more than 75% in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
education.

To conclude
, in my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
should
be granted
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
portray their efforts on their marks-sheet. Making it free for all would have no benefits in the long run, as this would abolish the competitive world of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that the government should provide free education at every level However some say individuals should pay for their university education Discuss both views and give your opinion

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
332 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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