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Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere To what extent do you agree with this view? v.19

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere v. 19
In this techno savvy era, the importance of the arts is decreasing. However, some folks consider that the authority should spend funds on other important things, not wasting on the arts. This essay will discuss why the art is entirely necessary and the government should have to spend money on arts despite some others factors. To begin with, the people who are in the favour that invest wealth in the arts is useless. They believe that there are some other desirable things on which the politics has to spend more fund than the arts. They think that the important areas like interpersonal skills and technology should the one on priority. For instance, the arts has a limited scope and the other areas have a vast variety of future fields. On the other hand, there are some favours that the arts are as important as others, so the ministry should have to invest money in it equally. Arts is the field in which everyone can show their skills and talent and in the days the artistic values are getting decreasing. For example, an artist invests his/her valuable time in learning the art value and if the government will not spend money on it, then they do not have any other future. To conclude, these people want that the union has to think about the investing money in the arts. In mu opinion, I strongly believe that it is a necessary step that the law has to spend more and more capital on the arts.
In this techno savvy era, the importance of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
is decreasing.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
folks consider that the authority should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
funds on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
things, not wasting on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
. This essay will discuss why the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is
entirely
necessary and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
despite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
others factors.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
that invest wealth in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
is useless. They believe that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
desirable things on which the politics
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more fund than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
areas like interpersonal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and technology should the one on priority.
For instance
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
has a limited scope and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
areas have a vast variety of future fields.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake. 'favours' is British English.
favours
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
are as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as others,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the ministry should
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
invest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in it
equally
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Arts
is the field in which everyone can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and talent and in the days the artistic values are getting decreasing.
For example
, an artist invests his/her valuable time in learning the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
value and if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
will not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on it, then they do not have any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
future.

To conclude
, these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
want that the union
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about the investing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
. In mu opinion, I
strongly
believe that it is a necessary step that the law
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more and more capital on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere v. 19

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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