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Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.2

Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour. v. 2
In modern days, various kinds of entertainment have gained in popularity in a great many ways, including fictional violence. Although this entertaining genre is considered to be harmless to some extent, it is also believed to have detrimental impacts on human society related to violent behaviors. This essay will analyze the two aforementioned perspectives and express my personal point of view. In several circumstances, fictional violence depicted on media channels seems to do no harm to the audience since it cannot exist in real life. Series " Avengers" of Marvel film production is a prime example of this case. All the violent scenes are performed by imaginary characters and happen outside the Earth so ordinary people are not capable of doing so. Additionally, violent behaviors are required in certain particular occupations like some professional spies of the CIA in the film called " Impossible mission" and seem to be irrelevant in other careers. However, fictional violence portrayed on TV is believed to have adverse effects and contribute to criminals ranging from juvenile delinquency to serial murder. In terms of adolescents, these figures are easier to be influenced by violent scenarios than those in other age groups owing to their immature mind. As a consequence, they tend to imitate those behaviors in their actual life which leads to numerous undesirable ramifications such as vandalism or theft. Furthermore, when these figures grow up, they may perform more devious and reckless behaviors to achieve their needs at all cost, even serial murder. To reiterate, whether fictional violence portrayed in the virtual world is harmless or not depends on how people are exposed to it. In my personal viewpoint, I suppose that this kind of entertainment does no harm to people as long as humans are self-determined and able to adjust their behaviors in every situation.
In modern days, various kinds of entertainment have gained in popularity in a great
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways, including
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fictional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violence
. Although this entertaining genre
is considered
to be harmless to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, it is
also
believed to have detrimental impacts on human society related to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behaviors
. This essay will analyze the two aforementioned perspectives and express my personal point of view.

In several circumstances,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fictional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violence
depicted on media channels seems to do no harm to the audience since it cannot exist in real life. Series
Possible spelling mistake found.
&quot
;
Possible spelling mistake found.
Avengers&quot
; of Marvel film production is a prime example of this case. All the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violent
scenes
are performed
by imaginary characters and happen outside the Earth
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
ordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are not capable of doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
.
Additionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behaviors
are required
in certain particular occupations like
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
professional spies of the CIA in the film called
Possible spelling mistake found.
&quot
; Impossible
Possible spelling mistake found.
mission&quot
; and seem to be irrelevant in other careers.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fictional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violence
portrayed on TV
is believed
to have adverse effects and contribute to criminals ranging from juvenile delinquency to serial murder. In terms of adolescents, these figures are easier to
be influenced
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violent
scenarios than those in other age groups owing to their immature mind. As a consequence, they tend to imitate those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behaviors
in their actual life which leads to numerous undesirable ramifications such as vandalism or theft.
Furthermore
, when these figures grow up, they may perform more devious and reckless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behaviors
to achieve their needs at all cost, even serial murder.

To reiterate, whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fictional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
violence
portrayed in the virtual world is harmless or not depends on how
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are exposed
to it. In my personal viewpoint, I suppose that this kind of entertainment does no harm to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
as long as humans are self-determined and able to adjust their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behaviors
in every situation.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that the fictional violence portrayed on television is harmless entertainment. Others disagree and think that it encourages violent behaviour. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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