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Some people think that success is the best measure for intelligence, while others thinks that intelligence can be measured in other ways. What is your opinion

Some people think that success is the best measure for intelligence, while others thinks that intelligence can be measured in other ways. What is your opinion BJMqw
Definition of the word intelligence has been controversy with regard to success. Some people believe that success can only be measured by an Intelligence whereas other people think intelligence is not common measure, because there are some other ways to judge success. This easy will discuss why intelligence is considered common measure but why other factors are ignored in contribution of success. With intelligence, other factors must consider in the contribution to the success. To begin firstly with, the people who believe that there is only standard of measuring success is an intelligence. Intelligent and brilliant people not only have great potential and strong will power but also strong motivation to achieve their desirous goals. They assume intelligent people are God gifted. Quaid-e- Azam Muhammed Ali Jinnah and Dr. Allama Muhammed Iqbal are the notable examples of their views. Youngest Microsoft Certified Professional Arfa Karim who got this success at the age of nine years can never be forgotten. Secondly, other people consider that a less intelligent person can achieve success with great passion, consistency, patience and work hard. There are a lot of examples people who failed in school and college life, but they proved that intelligence is not everything at all. Thomas Edison an inventor of light bulb failed 1000 times but succeeded at last. This essay has demonstrated why people think an intelligence is only measure but why other people argued different. In my opinion, both sides should have to keep in mind hard work, consistency, not gave up, patience and some other factors are key to success.
Definition of the word
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
intelligence
has been controversy with regard to
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success
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
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people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
be measured
by an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Intelligence
whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
intelligence
is not common measure,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
ways to judge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. This easy will discuss why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
intelligence
is considered
common measure
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
factors are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
in contribution of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. With
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
intelligence
,
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other
factors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
consider in the contribution to the success.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
firstly
with, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who believe that there is
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only
standard of measuring
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success
is an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
intelligence
. Intelligent and brilliant
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people
not
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only
have great potential and strong will power
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
strong motivation to achieve their desirous goals. They assume intelligent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are God gifted.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Quaid-e
-
Possible spelling mistake found.
Azam
Muhammed Ali Jinnah and Dr.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Allama
Muhammed Iqbal are the notable examples of their views.
A determiner is probably missing here: "the Youngest".
Youngest
Microsoft Certified Professional
Possible spelling mistake found.
Arfa
Karim who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
at the age of nine years can never
be forgotten
.

Secondly
,
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other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider that a less intelligent person can achieve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
with great passion, consistency, patience and work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
examples
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who failed in school and college life,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they proved that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
intelligence
is not everything at all. Thomas Edison an inventor of light bulb failed 1000 times
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
succeeded at last.

This essay has demonstrated why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
intelligence
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
measure
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argued
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
. In my opinion, both sides should
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in mind
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work, consistency, not gave up, patience and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
factors are key to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that success is the best measure for intelligence, while others thinks that intelligence can be measured in other ways. What is your opinion

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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