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some people think that subjects such as maths or philosophy are too difficult for children so that they should be optional

some people think that subjects such as maths or philosophy are too difficult for children so that they should be optional R2aEk
The issue of whether subjects such as mathematics or philosophy should be optional for children because of its difficulty to some students has provoked a storm of controversy. From my viewpoint, I am partly convinced by the statement for some reason indicated in this essay. First and foremost, one of the most compelling reasons to support the opinion is the right to have freedom of choice. To explain, it is necessary for students to be able to choose their favorite subjects and those helping them develop their potential to give the maximum output and outstanding results. A survey conducted by Oxford University has demonstrated this, by revealing the statistics of world’s top CEOs. The majority of them were allowed to focus on their preferred subjects and ended-up securing the highest position. Therefore, it is important that students have the right to pick the subjects to study. On the other hand, subjects like Mathematics or Philosophy have profound influence on human lives. They help children to understand from the simplicity to the most complex activities in their daily life, thus they need keeping mandatory despite its strain. However, by finding the appropriate teaching method, such as the tailored approach of Sweden teachers, students would no longer find it tough to achieve all the knowledge related to subjects which they used to be hesitant about. All things considered, although children should be enabled to choose fields which are their interest or specialty, hard subjects ought to be regarded to be more unchallenging when learning due to its vital role in lives.
The issue of whether
subjects
such as mathematics or philosophy should be optional for children
because
of its difficulty to
some
students
has provoked a storm of controversy. From my viewpoint, I am partly convinced by the statement for
some
reason indicated in this essay.

First
and foremost, one of the most compelling reasons to support the opinion is the right to have freedom of choice. To
explain
, it is necessary for
students
to be able to choose their favorite
subjects
and those helping them develop their potential to give the maximum output and outstanding results. A survey conducted by Oxford University has demonstrated this, by revealing the statistics of world’s top CEOs. The majority of them were
allowed
to focus on their preferred
subjects
and ended-up securing the highest position.
Therefore
, it is
important
that
students
have the right to pick the
subjects
to study.

On the other hand
,
subjects
like Mathematics or Philosophy have profound influence on human
lives
. They
help
children to understand from the simplicity to the most complex activities in their daily life,
thus
they need keeping mandatory despite its strain.
However
, by finding the appropriate teaching method, such as the tailored approach of Sweden teachers,
students
would no longer find it tough to achieve all the knowledge related to
subjects
which they
used
to be hesitant about.

All things considered, although children should
be enabled
to choose fields which are their interest or specialty,
hard
subjects
ought to
be regarded
to be more
unchallenging
when learning due to its vital role in
lives
.
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IELTS essay some people think that subjects such as maths or philosophy are too difficult for children so that they should be optional

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
259 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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