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Some people think that studying history is a waste of time while others think it is essential to learn history. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.3

Some people think that studying history is a waste of time while others think it is essential to learn history. v. 3
Young generations are considered to be the next leaders of the world. Learning the history of their nation is one of the most controversial issue nowadays, wherein, some people believe that it is essential for their development, while other commenters, affirmed that it is just a waste of time and there are more subject that are crucial. The writer, will discuss both views and followed by the conclusion To start with, history is a basic subject that included in the curriculum in most of the school. It is a one way to provide information about the past civilization were in it includes about the what was the activities they performed before and who are those brave people that sacrificed their activity for the sake of their Country. Apart from that, how their life revolved and what skills they have to survived way back a hundred years ago. Imparting these kinds of information to the young ones are crucial because once a youth has massive knowledge about their past, they tend to become appreciative and responsible citizen. However, there are some people affirmed that it is just a waste of time and rather Science should be put in the highest priority in school, because everything that surrounds us and all of the equipment that people utilizing nowadays it is all due to the outcome of the science. Hence, it is a tremendous help in the daily living of the human being and has a huge positive impact in the daily living. Apart from that, the product of science makes the people activity's facile. Thereby setting aside past is considered and focus more on this subject is crucial. To recapitulate, although past is essential to for the awareness of the youngster, however it is more vital to learn something that will shape their them to become successful in the future.
Young generations
are considered
to be the
next
leaders of the world. Learning the history of their nation is one of the most controversial issue nowadays, wherein,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that it is essential for their development, while other
Possible spelling mistake found.
commenters
, affirmed that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a waste of time and there are more subject that are crucial. The writer, will discuss both views and followed by the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
conclusion


To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, history is a basic subject that included in the curriculum in most of the school. It is a one way to provide information about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
civilization were in it includes about the what was the activities they performed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
and who are those brave
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that sacrificed their activity for the sake of their Country. Apart from that, how their life revolved and what
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
survived way back a hundred years ago. Imparting these kinds of information to the young ones are crucial
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
once a youth has massive knowledge about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
, they tend to become appreciative and responsible citizen.

However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
affirmed that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a waste of time and
rather
Science should
be put
in the highest priority in school,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
everything that surrounds us and
Consider using "all the".
all of the
equipment that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
utilizing nowadays it is all due to the outcome of the science.
Hence
, it is a tremendous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in the daily living of the human being and has a huge
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact in the daily living. Apart from that, the product of science
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
activity's facile. Thereby setting aside
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
is considered
and focus more on this subject is crucial.

To recapitulate, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
is essential to for the awareness of the youngster,
however
it is more vital to learn something that will shape their them to become successful in the future.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
The most intimate temper of a people, its deepest soul, is above all in its language.
Jules Michelet

IELTS essay Some people think that studying history is a waste of time while others think it is essential to learn history. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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