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Some people think that social skills are as important as academic qualifications To what extend do you agree or disagree v.1

Some people think that social skills are as important as academic qualifications v. 1
There is no denying of the fact that machine manufacture product faster than human, although man made items have their own authenticity. Few products need the keen attention to detail which is only possible by hand however to manufacture at large scale machines are used. This essay will examine the pros and cons of both type and will provide necessary illustration. To began with, in this 21st century, mass production is a problem which can be tackled by machines only. As they can run restlessly to meet the requirements. Further, machines are used in monotonous production, in other words, to manufacture a product over and over again machines are best suited for it. For example, in packing of chips machines are used as they are more efficient and effective which eventually increases the profit of the company. Machines are also very popular for rigorous jobs such as making of tools which require high precision and they are less likely to commit errors. On the other hand, man made things are more valuable and admired across the globe. A man’s work on a product increases its value greatly, for instance, consider painting. Painting is unique and are the creative work of an artist, which have lots of value. No machine can achieve that level of excellence. In case of ornaments and jewellery, design plays a vital role and it’s been handmade only. Also, it is the fact that man made products are priced high as compared to machine made items. To conclude, both man made and machine made having their potential advantages and disadvantages. Foremost in mass production machines are preferred and in artistic work handmade things have value, In my opinion, but, when production of product collision with these two method it comes to the personal preference.
There is no denying of the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
manufacture
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
faster than human, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man
made items have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
authenticity. Few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
need the keen attention to detail which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
possible by hand
however
to manufacture at large scale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
. This essay will examine the pros and cons of both type and will provide necessary illustration.

To began with, in this 21st century, mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
is a problem which can
be tackled
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
they can run
restlessly
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the requirements.
Further
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in monotonous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
,
in other words
, to manufacture a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
over and over again
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
are best suited for it.
For example
, in packing of chips
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
as they are more efficient and effective which
eventually
increases the profit of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Machines
are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
popular for rigorous jobs such as making of tools which require high
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
precision and
they are less likely to commit errors.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man
made things are more valuable and admired across the globe. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man’s
work on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
increases its value
greatly
,
for instance
, consider painting. Painting is unique and are the creative work of an artist, which have lots of value. No
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
can achieve that level of excellence. In case of ornaments and
Possible spelling mistake. 'jewellery' is British English.
jewellery
, design plays a vital role and it’s been handmade
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
.
Also
, it is the fact that
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
man made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are priced
high as compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
made items.

To conclude
, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
man
made and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machine
made having their potential advantages and disadvantages. Foremost in mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
are preferred
and in artistic work handmade things have value, In my opinion,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
collision with these two method it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to the personal preference.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that social skills are as important as academic qualifications v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
297 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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