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SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT PARENTS SHOULD TEACH THEIR CHILDREN TO BE GOOD MEMBERS OF SOCIETY. OTHERS, HOWEVER, BELIEVE THAT SCHOOL IS THE BEST PLACE TO LEARN THIS. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OWN OPINION

SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT PARENTS SHOULD TEACH THEIR CHILDREN TO BE GOOD MEMBERS OF SOCIETY. OTHERS, HOWEVER, BELIEVE THAT SCHOOL IS THE BEST PLACE TO LEARN THIS. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OWN OPINION MaLN
Man is a social being and no one can exist as an island. While some people hold the view that parents have the responsibility to teach their children to become a good member of the society, others feel that the school is the best place to learn social values. In my opinion, both the parents and the teachers have an indispensable role in shaping the character of their children. Firstly, parents are the primary teachers and home is the first school where the personality development of children is initiated. From birth to preschool children are under the sole custody of their parents. They imitate the actions of their parents and for this reason it is important for parents to become a good role model for their children. Parents are the best people to teach them the concept of good and bad. When they are taught to make this distinction from a young age, they are unlikely to go astray when they grow up. However, parents are not the only influence on children. Teachers at school have an equally important role to play in the formation of their character. The school is essentially a microcosm of the universe. Here the children get to interact with other children of different character, personality and family backgrounds. This exposure that they get at school plays a crucial role in the formation of their parents. It is the duty of parents to instil in them the values of discipline and social commitment. To conclude, parents and teachers both have an equally important role in moulding the character of children. In my opinion, their roles are complementary.
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Man
is a social being and no one can exist as an island. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
hold the view that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
have the responsibility to teach their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to become a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
member of the society, others feel that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is the best place to learn social values. In my opinion, both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
have an indispensable
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role
in shaping the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
character
of their children.

Firstly
,
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parents
are the primary
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teachers
and home is the
first
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school
where the personality development of
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children
is initiated
. From birth to preschool
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children
are under the sole custody of their
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parents
. They imitate the actions of their
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parents
and
for this reason
it is
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important
for
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parents
to become a
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good
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role
model for their
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children
.
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Parents
are the best
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people
to teach them the concept of
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good
and
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bad
. When they
are taught
to
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make
this distinction from a young age, they are unlikely to go astray when they grow up.
However
,
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parents
are not the
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only
influence on
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children
.
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Teachers
at
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school
have an
equally
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important
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role
to play in the formation of their
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character
. The
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school
is
essentially
a microcosm of the universe. Here the
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children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to interact with other
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children
of
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different
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character
, personality and family backgrounds. This exposure that they
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get
at
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school
plays a crucial
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role
in the formation of their
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parents
. It is the duty of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to
Possible spelling mistake. 'instil' is British English.
instil
in them the values of discipline and social commitment.

To conclude
,
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parents
and
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teachers
both have an
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in
Possible spelling mistake. 'moulding' is British English.
moulding
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
character
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. In my opinion, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roles
are complementary.
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IELTS essay SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT PARENTS SHOULD TEACH THEIR CHILDREN TO BE GOOD MEMBERS OF SOCIETY. OTHERS, HOWEVER, BELIEVE THAT SCHOOL IS THE BEST PLACE TO LEARN THIS. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OWN OPINION

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
271 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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