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Some people think that parents have the greatest influence on their child s academic development while other think that a child s teacher has more influence Discuss both sides and give your opinion v.2

Some people think that parents have the greatest influence on their child s academic development while other think that a child s teacher has more influence 2
According to some people parents play an important role in the academic development of their children, while other suggest that teacher has more influence than parents in child’s academic development. In my point of view both have their own influence, so in this essay we will discuss the importance of both parents and teachers. To begin with, a child’s better education is one of the most important responsibility of their parents. A child spent most of his time in their homes with parents, and parents need to keep an eye on the curricular and extracurricular activities of their childrens. For example, they need to check regularly their academic work, such as their home works, their daily school diaries and to correlate with their teachers, which results in a good academic achievement. Moreover, many children’s share their problems with their parents regarding their studies, because of the friendly environment between parents and childrens, and it had a great impact in the child’s academic development, and their were many issues which can be solved with help of their parents and a child gain more confidence with these type of friendship with their parents. However, teachers also have a great role in the academic development of a child, because they spent their growing and character building time with their teachers. They have the ability how to deal with different types of situation that a student face in their academic level, and teachers know very better solutions for these problems. So these teachers help very much in the academic and character building of a child. In my point of view, both parents and teachers have their main and enough role in the academic development of a child, and their mutual cooperation with each other, helps a lot in the academic development of a children and it is very useful for a bright future of a student.
According to
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some
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people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
parents
play an
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important
role in the
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academic
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development
of their
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children
, while other suggest that
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teacher
has more influence than
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parents
in
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child’s
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academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
. In my point of view both have their
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own
influence,
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so
in this essay we will discuss the importance of both
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parents
and teachers.

To
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begin
with, a
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child’s
better education is one of the most
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important
responsibility of their
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parents
. A
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child
spent most of his time in their homes with
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parents
, and
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parents
need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
an eye on the curricular and extracurricular activities of their
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childrens
.
For example
, they need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
regularly
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
work, such as their home works, their daily school diaries and to correlate with their
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teachers
, which results in a
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good
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academic
achievement.

Moreover
,
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many
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children’s
share their problems with their
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parents
regarding their studies,
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because
of the friendly environment between
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parents
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
childrens
, and it had a great impact in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child’s
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academic
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development
, and their were
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many
issues which can
be solved
with
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help
of their
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parents
and a
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child
gain more confidence with these type of friendship with their parents.

However
,
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teachers
also
have a great role in the
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academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of a
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child
,
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because
they spent their growing and character building time with their
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teachers
. They have the ability how to deal with
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different
types of situation that a student face in their
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academic
level, and
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teachers
know
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very
better solutions for these problems.
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So
these
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teachers
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help
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very
much in the
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academic
and character building of a child.

In my point of view, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
have their main and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
role in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
, and their mutual cooperation with each other,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
a lot in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful for a bright future of a student.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
43Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
I am always sorry when any language is lost, because languages are the pedigrees of nations.
Samuel Johnson

IELTS essay Some people think that parents have the greatest influence on their child s academic development while other think that a child s teacher has more influence 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
312 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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