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Some people think that new has no connection to people's lives, so it is a waste of time to read in newspapers and watch it on television

Some people think that new has no connection to people's lives, so it is a waste of time to read in newspapers and watch it on television ngVn
Nowadays, more people don't believe newspaper's information, they think that to watch news or read newspapers are not depend on human's life. I, however, disagree with this statement. To begin with, news on the television are reliable than other things, such as, internet or website. Because it is believed to give vital and reliable information, which are connected with People's life. Because journalists approach to reach and to identify seriously. And news are approved by the state. Furthermore, they always work on people's or government problems, who asks to help from government or who demand to have equal law with other people. Journalists should raise these problems and they should introduce to other resistants, how people are living, how are their circumstances. And government should take an action to solve people's problem. In addition, humans acknowledge that it is true. Because they invite people, who ask to help solving their problem or solve with fairness. Information on the internet always are false because more people want to be celebrity even they post on false information. Therefore, believe to news are better than internet.
Nowadays, more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
don't believe newspaper's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
or read newspapers are not
Consider using a past participle here: "depended".
depend
on human's life. I,
however
, disagree with this statement. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
on the television are
Use "(reliable)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
reliable
than other things, such as, internet or website.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
it
is believed
to give vital and reliable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, which
are connected
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
's life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
journalists approach to reach and to identify
seriously
. And
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
are approved
by the state.
Furthermore
, they always work on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
, who asks to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
or who demand to have equal law with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Journalists should raise these
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
problems and
they should introduce to other
Possible spelling mistake found.
resistants
, how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are living, how are their circumstances. And
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should take an action to solve
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
.
In addition
, humans acknowledge that it is true.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
they invite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, who ask to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
The verb 'help' is used with an infinitive: "to solve" or "solve".
solving
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
or solve with fairness.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Information
on the internet
The adverb 'always' usually goes after the verb 'are'.
always are
false
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want to be celebrity even they post on false
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
.
Therefore
,
The usual collocation for "believe" is "in" not "to". Did you mean "believe in"?
believe to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
are better than internet.
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IELTS essay Some people think that new has no connection to people's lives, so it is a waste of time to read in newspapers and watch it on television

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
183 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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