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Some people think that men and women have different qualities. Therefore, some certain jobs are suitable for men and some jobs are suitable for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.7

Some people think that men and women have different qualities. Therefore, some certain jobs are suitable for men and some jobs are suitable for women. v. 7
People argue that, due to diversity in qualities of men and women, there are some duties that only women can do and some work that only men can do. Although in this era woman can do everything, but I completely agree with the statement because the job that men can do, women cannot do the same duty with the same precision and vice versa. The men and women are both different mentally and physically. Men can do industrious chores for a long time without getting tired. In most of the case men have to use their physical strength to do the objective done, where not all women can do this. For example, to build a house, enormous amount of energy is required in some works such as lifting stuffs, hammering, digging and so many other tough works. Women are not as strong as men, so as this type of the chores women is not advised to work. Women also have some jobs, where men fail at them. In some job politeness and patients is essential. Most of the men do not have patient. They can tolerate an irritating situation for a long time. For example, only a mother can take care of her baby perfectly. When a baby starts crying only a woman can handle the situation quickly. To do a job like this, it requires so much mental energy and patients, where men are not good at this. In conclusion, because of different capability of men and women, they should only work where they are good at. Both of them are perfect at their own post and both of them are vital to keep a balance between health and wealth
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
argue that, due to diversity in qualities of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
duties that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
can do and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
can do. Although in this era woman can do everything,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
can do,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
cannot do the same duty with the same precision and vice versa.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
are both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
mentally and
physically
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Men
can do industrious chores for a long time without getting tired. In most of the case
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their physical strength to do the objective done, where not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
can do this.
For example
, to build a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
, enormous amount of energy
is required
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
works such as lifting stuffs, hammering, digging and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other tough works.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Women
are not as strong as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
as this type of the chores
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
is not advised to work.

Women
also
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
fail at them. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
politeness and patients is essential. Most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
do not have patient. They can tolerate an irritating situation for a long time.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
a mother can take care of her baby
perfectly
.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
a baby
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
crying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
a woman can handle the situation
quickly
. To do a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
like this, it requires
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much mental energy and patients, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at this.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
capability of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
, they should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
where they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at. Both of them are perfect at their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
post and both of them are vital to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
a balance between health and
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
wealth
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that men and women have different qualities. Therefore, some certain jobs are suitable for men and some jobs are suitable for women. v. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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