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Some people think that liking your job is more important than how much money you earn while others think that your salary is more important than how much you like your job. Compare the two views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people discuss that passion job is more important than how much money you made it. Others idea think that your salary decide your level in life. Passion job is more fascinating and excited at focus on working lead to good promotion opportunity at the company. Moreover, if you are really happy with your working, you will be good at going under pressure. Specially, you can be self-employed your work without dependence on influence of money or anything others. You can overcome adverse working conditions on the heavy workload because you really happy and you want to study more, you can improve some skills example for interpersonal skill, public speaking skill. Skill is the key to be success sooner. When you work by your heart, you will create worthy values and great admiration. On the others hand, salary is so crucial in our life, everyone want to earn a competitive salary so that they can expense for their private life or their family life. Salary can show their ability and make their achievement because they afford their best to learn many knowledges and research many documents in many years. We can have job prospects because you can fulfill the requirements to land at the company, so we will have high level salary job To sum up, in my opinion passion job is the most important, when you have a passion with anything, you will hard-working and extremely try to do it. It give many hands on experience and values others as great understanding and great skill.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
discuss that passion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than how much money you made it. Others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
decide your level in life.

Passion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is more fascinating and excited at focus on working lead to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
promotion opportunity at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.
Moreover
, if you are
really
happy with your working, you will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at going under pressure.
Specially
, you can be self-employed your work without dependence on influence of money or anything others. You can overcome adverse working conditions on the heavy workload
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
A verb may be missing.
you
really
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
happy and
you want to study more, you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
example for interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
, public speaking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Skill
is the key to be success sooner. When you work by your heart, you will create worthy values and great admiration.

On the others hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
crucial in our life, everyone
The pronoun ‘everyone’ is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: “wants”, “wanted”.
want
to earn a competitive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can expense for their private life or their family life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Salary
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their ability and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their achievement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they afford their best to learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake found.
knowledges
and research
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
documents in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years. We can have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
prospects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
you can fulfill the requirements to land at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we will have high level
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
job

To sum up, in my opinion passion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
, when you have a passion with anything, you will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
-working and
extremely
try to do it. It
After ‘It’, use the third-person verb form “gives”.
give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
The adjective “hands-on” is spelled with a hyphen.
hands on
experience and values others as great understanding and great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that liking your job is more important than how much money you earn while others think that your salary is more important than how much you like your job. Compare the two views and give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
256 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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