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Some people think that learning online is more efficient. However, according to some other people, studying from books is still the preferred method. Which is the better method of learning out of the two?

Some people think that learning online is more efficient. However, according to some other people, studying from books is still the preferred method. Which is the better method of learning out of the two? PgPxB
In the contemporary world with growing technology, studying Online is the new trend and being preffered over studying via books. However there are still flock of people who support the latter part of the argument. In this essay I will compare the two modes of learning and conclude which is better amongst the two. To commence with Online studying has its own merits like flexibility, convenience. Whilst, conventional method of studying provides it benefits like low cost, creativity, and a personal touch. To elucidiate Studying via books have a personal touch of studying that helps students to understand the concept and redress their queries. On the other hand, even when Online courses are available at convenience, there is a huge cost attached to it and not available to people living in remote area. While books are easily made available to people in remote areas as well that helps aid their studies and at a very low cost. To conclude, I concur to the benefits Online mode of learning provides, however they are offset by it’s drawbacks of high cost and low reach to students wherein books are inexpensive and easily available for studying. Hence I second the latter part of the argument that studying via books is the better method of learning.
In the contemporary world with growing technology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
is the new trend and being
Possible spelling mistake found.
preffered
over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
via
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
there are
still
flock of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who support the latter part of the argument. In this essay I will compare the two modes of learning and conclude which is better amongst the two.

To commence with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
merits like flexibility, convenience. Whilst, conventional method of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
provides it benefits like low cost, creativity, and a personal touch. To
Possible spelling mistake found.
elucidiate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Studying
via
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
have a personal touch of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
students to understand the concept and redress their queries.

On the other hand
, even when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
courses are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
at convenience, there is a huge cost attached to it and not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
living in remote area. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
are
easily
made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in remote areas
as well
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
aid their studies and at a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
low cost.

To conclude
, I concur to the benefits
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
mode of learning provides,
however
they are offset
Did you mean "by its drawbacks"?
by it’s drawbacks
of high cost and low reach to students wherein
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
are inexpensive and
easily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
available
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
I second the latter part of the argument that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
via
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
is the better method of learning.
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IELTS essay Some people think that learning online is more efficient. However, according to some other people, studying from books is still the preferred method. Which is the better method of learning out of the two?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
212 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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