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Some people think that job satisfaction is more important than job security. Others think that people cannot expect to enjoy a job and having a permanent job is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that job satisfaction is more important than job security. Others think that people cannot expect to enjoy a job and having a permanent job is more important. GqYx
In today’s society job has become one of the basic things. As individuals need food, clothes and shelter to live, all of these are not possible without a job. A number of people says that job satisfaction is much significant than the secured job, whereas other part of the population think that permanent job is required than to be happy on a job. I believe job satisfaction has a great importance over a fixed job. Let us analyze both the given viewpoints in the subsequent paragraphs. To embark on, let us shed light on why job satisfaction is much valued than job security. First and foremost, job is essential for an individual to support themselves financially. However, finding a perfect job that matches person’s education is almost like finding a needle in a haystack. To elaborate, because of growing competition job search is a stressful part of human. Once they find a job, it is time to relax and give their best to the company. In addition, happy and stress-free mind increase the efforts of a person towards performance, which is not possible without satisfaction. To clarify, company grows more if the employees are happy and satisfied from the work. To exemplify, an internal survey conducted by a private organisation named Work for you in March 2018, in Melbourne on their 100 employees, revealed that 60% of them agreed that satisfaction from job is their first priority rather than job security. As job satisfaction helps them to work without any hustle. On the contrary, having a permanent job is also an important factor to discuss. Primarily, as job is a need of the hour, everyone tries to find a job related to their expertise. Sometimes, people prefer to get a job which is permanent with good salary even if it is below their level. To explicate, permanent job makes them comfortable because now there is no need to find any other job to support themselves. To continue, in permanent job there are more chances of getting promotion. To explain, by remaining on one job for long time a person can enhance their experience that helps them to grow professionally in that industry. To illustrate, an article published in the morning news in August 2019, by editor Matt Brown stated that majority of people are still at their first job. As they explained that they do not want to change it because they have to build new relations at new job, whereas in old jobs everyone knows them and they are the senior employees. In my opinion, I assert that job satisfaction is more important than job security. I believe so because if an individual is satisfied from the work, they can work permanently at that place. But, without satisfaction any job will be a burden and will only be a source of Income rather than enjoyment. For example, if a person is not satisfied from their job but still doing that job, it will make them emotionless robots. Go to work from home, them come home from work and repeat. To encapsulate, it can be concluded that job is an important part of life to stay cheerful. Everyone wants a secure job for better future but if there is no satisfaction at that secure job there will be no happiness.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s society
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
has become one of the basic things. As individuals need food, clothes and shelter to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
, all of these are not possible without a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. A number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
says that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is much
Use "(significant)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
significant
than the secured
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, whereas other part of the population
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
permanent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is required
than to be happy on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. I believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
has a great importance over a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
us analyze both the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
viewpoints in the subsequent paragraphs.

To embark on,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
us shed light on why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is much valued than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
security.
First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is essential for an individual to support themselves
financially
.
However
, finding a perfect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that matches
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person’s
education is almost like finding a needle in a haystack. To elaborate,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of growing competition
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
search is a stressful part of human. Once they find a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, it is time to relax and give their best to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.
In addition
, happy and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
-free mind increase the efforts of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
towards performance, which is not possible without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
. To clarify,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
grows more if the employees are happy and satisfied from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. To exemplify, an internal survey conducted by a private
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
named
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Work
for you in March 2018, in Melbourne on their 100 employees, revealed that 60% of them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is their
first
priority
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
security.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
without any hustle.

On the contrary
, having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
permanent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is
also
an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factor to discuss.
Primarily
, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is a need of the hour, everyone tries to find a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
related to their expertise.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
which is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
permanent
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
salary even if it is below their level. To explicate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
permanent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them comfortable
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
there is no need to find any other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
to support themselves. To continue, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
permanent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
there are more chances of getting promotion.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
, by remaining on one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
for long time a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
can enhance their experience that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to grow
professionally
in that industry.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
To
illustrate, an article published in the morning news in August 2019, by editor Matt Brown stated that majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
still
at their
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. As they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
that they do not want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
build new relations at new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, whereas in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
everyone knows
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
them and
they are the senior employees.

In my opinion, I assert that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
security. I believe
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if an individual
is satisfied
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
permanently
at that place.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
will be a burden and will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be a source of Income
rather
than enjoyment.
For example
, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is not satisfied from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
still
doing that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them emotionless robots. Go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home, them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
home from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and repeat.

To encapsulate, it can
be concluded
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of life to stay cheerful. Everyone wants a secure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
for better future
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if there is no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
at that secure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
there will be no happiness.
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IELTS essay Some people think that job satisfaction is more important than job security. Others think that people cannot expect to enjoy a job and having a permanent job is more important.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
550 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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