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Some people think that it would be better for large companies and industry to move to regional areas outside urban centers. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that it would be better for large companies and industry to move to regional areas outside urban centers. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? xR5w
Nowadays, many individuals assert that industries relocation to the countryside from the urban centers would be advantageous to society. In my opinion, I agree to this statement and believe their merits are far more considerate than demerits which will be highlighted in the upcoming paragraphs. To begin with, there are many benefits when big production plants move from metropolitan to rural areas. Primarily, shifting from places would make these corporates beneficial in terms of disposing of their waste as cities have less areas to dump junk materials in comparison with the outskirts. Not only it can reduce the various types of pollution caused in the town, but also will lead to proper disposing of waste without disturbing the ecosystem. Secondarily, people in rural areas get employment opportunities as the setup of manufacturing units requires labor for the production of goods. Thus, it can improve their standard of living along with the development of the local town. For instance, a report published by the Ministry of Industry and Commerce, India in August 2016 stated that job prospects as well as infrastructure of the local areas took a huge leap after the industries moved to the small areas from urban centers. Furthermore, congestion of open land areas has always been a headache for big corporations however, it is achievable for them in the outer areas of the cities as they have an abundance of lands that can allow them to setup big factories resulting in increasing their revenues. On the contrary, certainly there are demerits of shifting the plants to the rural areas. Firstly, production of goods can be hampered. To enhance, setting up units in the remote areas causes difficulty as the transportation facilities and availability of the raw materials are less in those areas. Not only it can reduce their efficiency, but also can degrade the prestigious name and reputation of the company. Secondly, it can lead to unemployment in the cities. To clarify, when an industry closes their operations and resettles to other remote areas, the job openings in the metro areas decline gradually. For instance, a survey conducted by the World Economic Forum in October 2018 in the USA over 500 individuals showed that over 80 percent of them became unemployed due to shifting of the companies to areas rather than cities. To encapsulate, it can be concluded that although the advantages of production units being shifted to non-metro areas are significant, their disadvantages cannot be ignored. If a balanced approach is followed in terms of providing job security and better transportation aspects of goods then companies can generate huge volumes of profits.
Nowadays,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
individuals assert that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
relocation to the countryside from the urban centers would be advantageous to society. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to this statement and believe their merits are far more considerate than demerits which will
be highlighted
in the upcoming paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits when
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
plants
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
from metropolitan to rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
.
Primarily
, shifting from places would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
these
Possible spelling mistake found.
corporates
beneficial in terms of disposing of their waste as cities have
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun areas is countable.
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
to dump junk materials
in comparison
with the outskirts. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the various types of pollution caused in the town,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
will lead to proper disposing of waste without disturbing the ecosystem.
Secondarily
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
employment opportunities as the setup of manufacturing units requires labor for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
.
Thus
, it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their standard of living along with the development of the local town.
For instance
, a report published by the Ministry of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Industry
and Commerce, India in August 2016 stated that job prospects
as well
as infrastructure of the local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
took a huge leap after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
from urban centers.

Furthermore
, congestion of open land
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
has always been a headache for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
corporations
however
, it is achievable for them in the outer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
of the cities as they have an abundance of lands that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them
The verb 'set up' is spelled as two words. The noun 'setup' is spelled as one.
to setup
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
factories resulting in increasing their revenues.

On the contrary
,
certainly
there are demerits of shifting the plants to the rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
can
be hampered
. To enhance, setting up units in the remote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
causes difficulty as the transportation facilities and availability of the raw materials are less in those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
their efficiency,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
can degrade the prestigious name and reputation of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.
Secondly
, it can lead to unemployment in the cities. To clarify, when an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
closes their operations and resettles to other remote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
, the job openings in the metro
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
decline
gradually
.
For instance
, a survey conducted by the World Economic Forum in October 2018 in the USA over 500 individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that over 80 percent of them became unemployed due to shifting of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
rather
than cities.

To encapsulate, it can
be concluded
that although the advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
units
being shifted
to non-metro
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
are significant, their disadvantages cannot be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
. If a balanced approach
is followed
in terms of providing job security and better transportation aspects of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
can generate huge volumes of profits.

IELTS essay Some people think that it would be better for large companies and industry to move to regional areas outside urban centers. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
435 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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