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Some people think that it is necessary to travel abroad to learn about other countries, but other people think that it is not necessary to travel abroad because all the information can be seen at TV and the internet. Discuss both opinions and give your own opinion.

It is said that the vast majority of individuals opt for travelling abroad to explore new countries rather than people, who prefer to discover them from the Internet or TV sources. To my mind we should investigate this world by ourselves, especially by reasonable prices on air tickets via low-cost airlines. I will describe both visions towards this topic in this essay. Admittedly, there are few upsides that may have detrimental impact to back up the idea of investigating the world. Travelling is becoming affordable for the populace every day. Consequently, people are not in need of paying through the nose. For instance, in the famous and the cheapest airline company ‘Ryanair’, tickets start from 1 euro through the European countries. Eventually, most denizens are able to have a blast on weekends in different parts of the world. Secondly, it’s a great pleasure where people can grab new experience, national cuisine, and knowledge from other countries. Besides, it’s a great way to leave the worries of the world behind and meet new people. Visiting new tourist and vivid places expands our mindset of this community. Moreover, people that visit new places have less anxiety and depression. For instance, about 67% of travellers aren’t upset about their life due to their positive mind and view on life. On the other hand, we have another part of people, who would like to study new things from all over the world through the Internet. From TV and the world wide network these people can absorb some tips and flamboyant facts of cities via popular bloggers, where they pass on some comfy and useful information. In this case people have free access to this portion of source and they don’t need to prepare guidelines or maps with the list of top-notch sightseeing. For instance, 23% of citizens strive to watch videos and youtube channels to investigate new spots. By and large, as we can see there are more benefits to offline travelling rather than online. In my view, only seeing new smashing views or spots give us unforgettable memories that will leave with us for the long run.
It
is said
that the vast majority of individuals opt for travelling abroad to explore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
countries
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, who prefer to discover them from the Internet or TV sources. To my mind we should investigate this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
by ourselves,
especially
by reasonable prices on air tickets via low-cost airlines. I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
both visions towards this topic in this essay.

Admittedly
, there are few upsides that may have detrimental impact to back up the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of investigating the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
. Travelling is becoming affordable for the populace every day.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not in need of paying through the nose.
For instance
, in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
and the cheapest airline
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
‘Ryanair’, tickets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
from 1 euro through the European countries.
Eventually
, most denizens are able to have a blast on weekends in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parts of the world.

Secondly
, it’s a great pleasure where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can grab
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
experience, national cuisine, and knowledge from other countries.
Besides
, it’s a great way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the worries of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
behind and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
tourist and vivid places expands our mindset of this community.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
places have less anxiety and depression.
For instance
, about 67% of
Possible spelling mistake. ‘travellers’ is British English.
travellers
aren’t upset about their life due to their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
mind and view on life.

On the other hand
, we have another part of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, who would like to study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
things from all over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
through the Internet. From TV and the
The adjective/adverb “worldwide” is spelled as one word.
world wide
network these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can absorb
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
tips and flamboyant facts of cities via popular bloggers, where they pass on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
comfy and useful information.
In this case
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have free access to this portion of
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
source and
they don’t need to prepare guidelines or maps with the list of top-notch sightseeing.
For instance
, 23% of citizens strive to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
videos and
The official name of this popular video platform is spelled with a capital “T”.
youtube
channels to investigate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
spots.

By and large, as we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
there are more benefits to offline travelling
rather
than online.

In my view,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
seeing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
smashing views or spots give us unforgettable memories that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
with us for the long run.
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IELTS essay Some people think that it is necessary to travel abroad to learn about other countries, but other people think that it is not necessary to travel abroad because all the information can be seen at TV and the internet.

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
354 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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