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some people think that internet has brought people closer together, while others think that people and communities have become more isolated. discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

some people think that internet has brought people closer together, while others think that people and communities have become more isolated. v. 1
There is no doubt that internet has proved to be an innovative technology. While some people believe that internet has been useful to bring people closer, others argue that it is responsible for isolation among people and communities. This essay discusses both sides of this argument, and then I will give my own perspective. Many people argue that internet has played a great role in bringing people near to each other. One of the way is through online interaction. For example, various online audio and video calling applications are available nowadays, through which people could contact their loved ones who reside at the farther corners of the world. In addition, distance learning is also an example of bringing teachers and students closer, who dwell in two different continents of the world. Thus, this makes it clear that internet has brought a revolutionary change on this globe by connecting people to each other through several online calling and chatting features and made this world a global village. On the contrary, it is believed by many people that isolation has occurred among people and communities due to internet. This is because this technology has urged people to live in an imaginary and a fake world. For instance, nowadays, people have hundreds of Facebook friends, but not a single friend in real with whom they could have face-to-face interaction. In addition, no communal bonding can be seen these days due to the presence of online virtual groups. As a result, people suffer from more anxiety and depression nowadays, unlike in the past. In conclusion, I believe both sides have their merits. On balance, it is my opinion that internet has actually created isolation among people and communities which should be lessen to ensure strong communal bonding and to reduce psychological issues among people.
There is no doubt that internet has proved to be an innovative technology. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that internet has been useful to bring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
closer, others argue that it is responsible for isolation among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and communities. This essay discusses both sides of this argument, and then I will give my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
perspective.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that internet has played a great role in bringing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
near to each other. One of the way is through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
interaction.
For example
, various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
audio and video calling applications are available nowadays, through which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could contact their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
ones who reside at the farther corners of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
In addition
, distance learning is
also
an example of bringing teachers and students closer, who dwell in two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
continents of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
Thus
, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that internet has brought a revolutionary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
on this globe by connecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to each other through several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
calling and chatting features and made this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
a global village.

On the contrary
, it
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that isolation has occurred among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and communities due to internet. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this technology has urged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in an imaginary and a fake
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
For instance
, nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have hundreds of Facebook friends,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not a single friend in real with whom they could have face-to-face interaction.
In addition
, no communal bonding can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
these days due to the presence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
virtual groups.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suffer from more anxiety and depression nowadays, unlike in the past.

In conclusion
, I believe both sides have their merits. On balance, it is my opinion that internet has actually created isolation among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and communities which should be
Consider using the past participle "lessened"?
lessen
to ensure strong communal bonding and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
psychological issues among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay some people think that internet has brought people closer together, while others think that people and communities have become more isolated. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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