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Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent. ymM3
Some people believe that modern life makes the global citizen more dependent on others. However, some others are opposed to this idea, claiming that we are more stand on our own feet and free from dependency on others as time has progressed. Individually, believe that this is a matter to be debated in light of several factors before any conclusion can draw. On the one hand, it generally believes that the more expensive and challenging life is, the less self-sufficient we are. The reason for this is mainly because the living expenses such as school fees, accommodation, and daily commodities have dramatically soared constantly, so we should rely on our parents to adapt to our daily needs until getting a decent job. Furthermore, with the complicated and specialized tasks, teamwork and collaboration among different departments are more important than individual accomplishments. In a word, there are several running reasons connected with the reliance on each other lately. On the other hand, it is factual that technological advances have made modern citizens rely on the machinery's highlighting functions more than the other. Specifically, online services facilitate the human to gain access to everything and efficiently address all problems without seeking other support. Families are becoming smaller and more dispersed, which means that people could not count on relatives as much as they used to and tend to be far from home. As a prime example, many students choose to study abroad instead of going to their local university, and this practical experience makes them more independent as they further live alone. For the reasons mentioned above, while there are some reasons to believe that people now depend on each other more, it seems that we are more independent than ever.
Some
people
believe
that modern life
makes
the global citizen more dependent on others.
However
,
some
others
are opposed
to this
idea
, claiming that we are more stand on our
own
feet and free from dependency on others as time has progressed.
Individually
,
believe
that this is a matter to
be debated
in light of several factors
before
any conclusion can draw.

On the one hand, it
generally
believes
that the more expensive and challenging life is, the less self-sufficient we are. The
reason
for this is
mainly
because
the living expenses such as school fees, accommodation, and daily commodities have
dramatically
soared
constantly
,
so
we should rely on our parents to adapt to our daily needs until getting a decent job.
Furthermore
, with the complicated and specialized tasks, teamwork and collaboration among
different
departments are more
important
than individual accomplishments. In a word, there are several running
reasons
connected with the reliance on each
other
lately.

On the
other
hand, it is factual that technological advances have made modern citizens rely on the machinery's highlighting functions more than the
other
.
Specifically
, online services facilitate the human to gain access to everything and
efficiently
address all problems without seeking
other
support. Families are becoming smaller and more dispersed, which means that
people
could not count on relatives as much as they
used
to and tend to be far from home. As a prime example,
many
students choose to study abroad
instead
of going to their local university, and this practical experience
makes
them more independent as they
further
live
alone.

For the
reasons
mentioned above, while there are
some
reasons
to
believe
that
people
now
depend on each
other
more, it seems that we are more independent than ever.
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IELTS essay Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each other, while others think that people have become more independent.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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