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Some people think that governments should ban dangerous sports, while others think people should have the freedom to do any sports or activity.

Some people think that governments should ban dangerous sports, while others think people should have the freedom to do any sports or activity. 2PK7j
These days, sports activity play an important role in support human health as well as society, on the contrary numerous people think they are nothing more than entertainment activity. While, I also tend to agree with sports play a significance in the development of society, but I also do not oppose the idea it nothing leisure activity. On the one hand, sports activity bring number of benefits for human health as increase the flexibility, enhance memory or keep-fit of the body. For instance, when you jogging will assist growth fitness also keep your body beautiful shape, or yoga practice help your skin look taut. Next, sport play an important role in the develop each aspect of the national in the region and the world. For example, sports activity in the Seagame as swimming, running, archery… are regional. Obviously, the national men football team has made a lot of history for Vietnamese football with reaching the third qualify round of the World Cup 2022. On the other hand, leisure activity as well as role in a significant part in development of society. Firstly, entertainment activity help reduce stress and fatigue such as after a tiring day of work, you can watch comedy shows or listen to several favorite songs, which will help you feel more relax. Secondly, watching leisure programs also help you improve the knowledge in more aspect. For instance, when you watch “who to be a millionaire” the questions of program will help understand more about numerous fields. Conclusion, it seem to me that the idea for sport play a significant role in the develop of society is better than leisure activity
These days,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in support human health
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
,
on the contrary
numerous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
they are nothing more than entertainment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
. While, I
also
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
a significance in the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
also
do not oppose the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'it'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
it nothing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
activity.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
bring number of benefits for human health as increase the flexibility, enhance memory or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
-fit of the body.
For instance
, when
Did you mean "you're jogging", "you are jogging", or "you were jogging"?
you jogging
will assist growth fitness
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
your body
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
shape, or yoga practice
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
your skin look taut.
Next
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in
After 'the', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'develop' is correct. If 'develop' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
the develop
each aspect of the national in the region and the world.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Seagame
as swimming, running, archery… are regional.
Obviously
, the national
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
football team has made
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
history for Vietnamese football with reaching the third qualify round of the World Cup 2022.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in a significant part in development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
Firstly
, entertainment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and fatigue such as after a tiring day of work, you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
comedy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
or listen to several favorite songs, which will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you feel more relax.
Secondly
, watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
programs
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the knowledge in more aspect.
For instance
, when you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
“who to be a millionaire” the questions of program will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
understand more about numerous fields.

Conclusion, it
Did you mean "seems"?
seem
to me that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
a significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
in
After 'the', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'develop' is correct. If 'develop' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
the develop
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
is better than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
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IELTS essay Some people think that governments should ban dangerous sports, while others think people should have the freedom to do any sports or activity.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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