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Some people think that governments must insist on preserving traditional appearance of old buildings undergoing renovation or redevelopment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement? v.2

Some people think that governments must insist on preserving traditional appearance of old buildings undergoing renovation or redevelopment. with the statement? v. 2
The old building always reflects typically own local civilization, tradition, and so on. These historical buildings, whether the responsible regime carefully protects to reasonably use public funds or precious fund will properly allocate other possible ways. I agree remarkably with this factual statement. I intend to discuss in the following why the authority should take care of ancient buildings. To begin with, traditional buildings have historical values that typically indicate a society's cultural identity. Without properly protecting old buildings, it is hard to carefully secure own community tradition and civilization. Even, young people gain knowledge of ancestry building how their noble ancestor willingly sacrificed their precious life to positively establish a well cultured society for them. Besides, if the regime would properly protect old buildings, then the tourists will lure that buildings and authority would naturally generate funds from those tourists. Additionally, many countries have built new buildings and carefully restored old buildings due to wisely keeping, maintaining an impressive combination of old and new which are allured tourists. However, people who adamantly oppose this statement are thinking that restoring old buildings is a waste of taxpayer money. For example, many underdeveloped countries have not adequate funds to allocate the repair of historic buildings because they have other priority sectors such as health, education, and so on. Furthermore, the population of many countries has increased alarmingly but space to live has decreased so that a traditional building will be replaced to construct modern buildings. To sum up, the conventional building has traditional values so that the regime should properly take care of them otherwise it will demolish society's civilization.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
always reflects
typically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
local civilization, tradition, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. These historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
, whether the responsible regime
carefully
protects to
reasonably
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
public funds or precious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fund
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
properly
allocate other possible ways. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
remarkably
with this factual statement. I intend to discuss in the following why the authority should take care of ancient buildings.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
have historical values that
typically
indicate a society's cultural identity. Without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
properly
protecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
carefully
secure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
community tradition and civilization. Even, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
gain knowledge of ancestry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
how their noble ancestor
willingly
sacrificed their precious life to
positively
establish a well cultured society for them.
Besides
, if the regime would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
properly
protect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
, then the tourists will lure that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
and authority would
naturally
generate funds from those tourists.
Additionally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries have built new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
and
carefully
restored
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
due to
wisely
keeping, maintaining an impressive combination of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
and new which
are allured
tourists.

However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
adamantly
oppose this statement are thinking that restoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
is a waste of taxpayer money.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
underdeveloped countries have not adequate funds to allocate the repair of historic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have other priority sectors such as health, education, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Furthermore
, the population of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries has increased
alarmingly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
space to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
has decreased
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that a traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
will
be replaced
to construct modern buildings.

To sum up, the conventional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
has traditional values
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the regime should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
properly
take care of them
otherwise
it will demolish society's civilization.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Language comes first. It’s not that language grows out of consciousness, if you haven’t got language, you can’t be conscious.
Alan Moore

IELTS essay Some people think that governments must insist on preserving traditional appearance of old buildings undergoing renovation or redevelopment. with the statement? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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