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Some people think that exercise is the key to health while others feels that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

Some people think that exercise is the key to health while others feels that having a balanced diet is more important. v. 1
Being healthy has become one of the crucial factors in our daily lives. Are we following a healthy lifestyle? Some argue that performing physical activities is a root to remain healthy, while other consider appropriate eating of paramount importance. In my opinion, a nutritional diet serve as a supporting pillar for carrying out physical activities, and hence, ought to have utmost importance. Physical exercise has always been considered as part of healthy well-being. In general, it is always advisable to spend at least 30 minutes, on-daily basis, for exercising. For instance, those who bring this in their daily routine, irrespective of their schedule, are found to be more; physically fit and active. Furthermore, they have shown reduced signs of ageing, and also, they are found to have stronger immune system to fight against diseases, which consequently, has improved their overall fitness level. To sum up, remain physically active can do wonders to ones health and help them to look younger. On the other hand, in order to remain physically active, one has to have a balanced diet; for constant source of energy and power. In other words, absence of proper food, will neither activate body cell nor generate energy in body. For example, according to dietitians, our body follows 70: 30 rule; 70% of diet and 30% of exercise, and this 70% of nutritional food will help in releasing energy to body cells for doing exercise. In addition, unhealthy food can not be digested, irrespective of performing several hours of exercise. To summarise, balanced diet acts as a fuel to generate energy in our body and support physical activities. In conclusion, physical exercise and balanced diet, goes hand-in-hand; however, the later supports the former for a healthy lifestyle. Therefore, in my opinion, one must give more importance to diet in maintaining healthy life.
Being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
has become one of the crucial factors in our daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Are we following a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
lifestyle?
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
argue that performing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
activities is a root to remain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
, while other consider appropriate eating of paramount importance. In my opinion, a nutritional diet serve as a supporting pillar for carrying out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
activities, and
hence
, ought to have utmost importance.

Physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
has always
been considered
as part of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
well-being.
In general
, it is always advisable to spend at least 30 minutes, on-daily basis, for exercising.
For instance
, those who bring this in their daily routine, irrespective of their schedule,
are found
to be more;
physically
fit and active.
Furthermore
, they have shown
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
signs of
Possible spelling mistake. 'ageing' is British English.
ageing
, and
also
, they
are found
to have stronger immune system to fight against diseases, which
consequently
, has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
their
overall
fitness level. To sum up, remain
physically
active can do wonders to
Did you mean "one's"?
ones
health and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to look younger.

On the other hand
, in order to remain
physically
active, one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
have a balanced diet; for constant source of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
and power.
In other words
, absence of proper food, will neither activate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
cell nor generate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
.
For example
, according to dietitians, our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
follows 70: 30
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
; 70% of diet and 30% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
, and this 70% of nutritional food will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in releasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
cells for doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
.
In addition
, unhealthy food can not
be digested
, irrespective of performing several hours of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
. To
Possible spelling mistake. 'summarise' is British English.
summarise
, balanced diet acts as a fuel to generate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
and support
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
activities.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
and balanced diet, goes hand-in-hand;
however
, the
Did you mean "latter" (=the second of two items)?
later
supports the former for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
lifestyle.
Therefore
, in my opinion, one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
give more importance to diet in maintaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
life.
18Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
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Persian Proverb

IELTS essay Some people think that exercise is the key to health while others feels that having a balanced diet is more important. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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