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Some people think that children should be taught only in schools. However, others argue that childen should be taken outside the achool premises for practical study.Which opinion do you consider the appropoiate one?

Some people think that children should be taught only in schools. However, others argue that childen should be taken outside the achool premises for practical study. Which opinion do you consider the appropoiate one? 11WpW
The discussion whether parents should send childs outside for practical study or only have to teach only io school is quiet hard to figure out. This essay therefore, presents both these views and forwards my opinion and venerating the later idea due refreshment. There exist mainly of couple of reasons why school shouldnot organize outside practical study. First of all, for the extra fee, school plans to take students out of the school. For example, school rise up in profit they ask for more money by naming extra study. Likewise, sending children without any precautions is a hazardous thing to do. In othes words, what if they ruin needy items or injure themselves? On the contrary, other people assert that allowing their children to give a chance to take in extra curiculum activites is a great decision fox their future. Primarily, by participating in practical study, student can gain more knowledge and ideas of related subject. For instance, they could be able to understand more fastly than of classroom study. Similarly, underetasiding the world will be easier and coonvenient for stundents than of book study. As a result students shall be likely to have sharp mind and be able to answer about their curiosity. Bringing the illustration of my personal opinion, schools are doing good thing for taking out children for practical study for the following reasons. Firstly, from the very beginning, childrens are locked up like a animals in a zoo and never got chance to roam around rather than houuse and school. It might be a good excuse for children's refreshment. The next point is: parents get free time to do their works instead of look after their children. Hence, they will be able to relax and buy some privacy. In conclusion, the views on the student's practical study vary depending upon the people's interest and their way of thinking. However, I believe that children should be taken outside for practical study.
The discussion whether parents should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "children", the plural form of the noun 'child'?
childs
outside for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
teach
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
Possible spelling mistake found.
io
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is
Did you mean "quite"? 'quiet' means 'silent', 'quite' mean 'very' or 'to a moderate extent'
quiet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to figure out. This essay
therefore
, presents both these views and forwards my opinion and venerating the later
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
due refreshment.

There exist
mainly
of
It seems that an article is missing.
couple of
reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
Possible spelling mistake found.
shouldnot
organize outside
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, for the extra fee,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
plans to take students out of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
rise up in profit they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ask for
more money by naming extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
Likewise
, sending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
without any precautions is a hazardous thing to do. In
Possible spelling mistake found.
othes
words, what if they ruin needy items or injure themselves?

On the contrary
, other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
assert that allowing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to give a chance to take in extra
Possible spelling mistake found.
curiculum
Possible spelling mistake found.
activites
is a great decision fox their future.
Primarily
, by participating in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
, student can gain more knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
of related subject.
For instance
, they could be able to understand more
Possible spelling mistake found.
fastly
than of classroom
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
Similarly
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
underetasiding
the world will be easier and
Possible spelling mistake found.
coonvenient
for
Possible spelling mistake found.
stundents
than of book
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
As a result
students shall be likely to have sharp mind and be able to answer about their curiosity.

Bringing the illustration of my personal opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are doing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
thing for taking out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
for the following reasons.
Firstly
, from the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beginning,
Possible spelling mistake found.
childrens
are locked
up like
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "a animal" or simply "animals"?
a animals
in a zoo and never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
chance to roam around
rather
than
Possible spelling mistake found.
houuse
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. It might be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
excuse for children's refreshment. The
next
point is: parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
free time to do their works
instead
of look after their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Hence
, they will be able to relax and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
privacy.

In conclusion
, the views on the student's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
vary depending upon the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's interest and their way of thinking.
However
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
be taken
outside for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that children should be taught only in schools. However, others argue that childen should be taken outside the achool premises for practical study. Which opinion do you consider the appropoiate one?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
324 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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