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Some people think that children can learn efficiently by watching television. Therefore, children should be encourage to watch TV both at school and home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that children can learn efficiently by watching television. Therefore, children should be encourage to watch TV both at school and home. wmXaq
In recent years, many people approve that television content is an effective source for child’s development; therefore, children should spend time on watching television not only at home but also at school. From my point of view, I strongly disagree with that idea. In this essay, I will try to address reasons why watching television is not good for children and propose alternative better methods. To begin with, televisions’ negative effects on children outweigh its positive. Nowadays, television content providers offer many channels with different kind of contents; however, most of them are about entertainment such as movies and television shows, which are not suitable for children. Furthermore, spending too much time on watching television affects negatively on both physical and mental aspects of children. For instance, concentrating on the screen for a long time will significantly weaken their eyes; besides that, children will be more passive and dependent because of the lack of outside activities. Furthermore, if children watch tv in school also then their interaction with the teachers would be limited. Teachers teach a lot of things aprat from academics. They stimulate the students. What is more, children would read less when they learn everything from Tv. Reading is an avtive activity as compared to Tv which is a passive activity. On the other hand, there are other alternative learning forms which are better for children. Firstly, outdoor activities will help children develop their physical strength and enhance their awareness about surrounding subjects and events; therefore, children should spend time on playing outside with others rather than staying at home to watch television. Secondly, adults should spend time with their children going to places such as museums, zoos and gardens; hence, with real life engagement, children will be more interested and learn faster. To conclude, I believe that watching television is not an efficient way for children to learn new things. Adults should encourage their children doing outdoor activities to enhance their awareness better.
In recent years,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
approve that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
content is an effective source for child’s development;
therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
at home
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
at school. From my point of view, I
strongly
disagree with that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
. In this essay, I will try to address reasons why watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and propose alternative better methods.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
televisions’
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
outweigh its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
. Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
content providers offer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
channels with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kind of contents;
however
, most of them are about entertainment such as movies and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
, which are not suitable for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Furthermore
, spending too much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
affects
negatively
on both physical and mental aspects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
For instance
, concentrating on the screen for a long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
will
significantly
weaken their eyes;
besides
that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will be more passive and dependent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the lack of outside
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
.
Furthermore
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
in school
also
then their interaction with the teachers would
be limited
. Teachers teach
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
things
Possible spelling mistake found.
aprat
from academics. They stimulate the students.
What is more
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
would read less when they learn everything from
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tv
. Reading is an
Possible spelling mistake found.
avtive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
as compared to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tv
which is a passive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
.
On the other hand
, there are other alternative learning forms which are better for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Firstly
, outdoor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
develop their physical strength and enhance their awareness about surrounding subjects and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
;
therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on playing outside with others
rather
than staying at home to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
.
Secondly
, adults should spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
going to places such as museums, zoos and gardens;
hence
, with real life engagement,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
will be more interested and learn faster.

To conclude
, I believe that watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
is not an efficient way for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to learn new things. Adults should encourage their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
doing outdoor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
to enhance their awareness better.
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IELTS essay Some people think that children can learn efficiently by watching television. Therefore, children should be encourage to watch TV both at school and home.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
326 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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