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Some people think that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters such as food, clothes and entertainment is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decision about matters that affect them. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.5

Some people think that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters such as food, clothes and entertainment is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decision about matters that affect them. v. 5
A highly controversial issue appears to relate to whether children should be given liberty to decide on daily needs or it will create selfish individuals in our society. This essay will shed light on both sides of the discussion and provide my personal view on the matter. On the one hand, children who are allowed to choose whatever they like would struggle with personality disorders later on. To wit, if juveniles are allowed to reach everything without any restriction they might ignore affordability of their parents of what they wish to purchase. As a result, they will become overindulgent and self-centred individuals in the future who underestimate necessities of the family and care only about his own wishes recklessly. On the other hand, decision-making is a critical and crucial skill for a child to acquire in order to succeed in future life and career. Psychologists often express that interrupting youngsters’ choices will cause them to become fragile-minded and diffident. Needless to say, offspring who is able to decide on basic needs right from his childhood can deal with conflicts and challenges in life more efficiently. Besides, deciding on day-to-day basis makes them independent and build their confidence. These practices, make youngsters proactive and aids them get used to take decision and responsibility for any situation and action. For example, if a boy knows why he needs to watch a program without asking anyone then he ultimately develops the skill of what is suitable for him. To conclude, both sides, once debated from distinct angles seem to hold sensible reasons. However, I assert that parents should make sure that children are free in choosing what to eat or wear and how to entertain so that they do not lack self-confidence and creativity.
A
highly
controversial issue appears to relate to whether children should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
liberty to decide on daily needs or it will create selfish individuals in our society. This essay will shed light on both sides of the discussion and provide my personal view on the matter.

On the one hand, children who are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to choose whatever they like would struggle with personality disorders later on. To wit, if juveniles are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to reach everything without any restriction they might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
affordability of their parents of what they wish to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
.
As a result
, they will become overindulgent and
Possible spelling mistake found.
self-centred
individuals in the future who underestimate necessities of the family and care
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
about his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
wishes
recklessly
.

On the other hand
, decision-making is a critical and crucial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
for a child to acquire in order to succeed in future life and career. Psychologists
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
express that interrupting youngsters’ choices will cause them to become fragile-minded and diffident. Needless to say, offspring who is able to decide on basic needs right from his childhood can deal with conflicts and challenges in life more
efficiently
.
Besides
, deciding on day-to-day basis
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them independent and build their confidence. These practices,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
youngsters proactive and aids them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to take decision and responsibility for any situation and action.
For example
, if a boy knows why he needs to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
a program without asking anyone then he
ultimately
develops the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
of what is suitable for him.

To conclude
, both sides, once debated from distinct angles seem to hold sensible reasons.
However
, I assert that parents should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure that children are free in choosing what to eat or wear and how to entertain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they do not lack self-confidence and creativity.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
The most intimate temper of a people, its deepest soul, is above all in its language.
Jules Michelet

IELTS essay Some people think that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters such as food, clothes and entertainment is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decision about matters that affect them. v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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